suedenim

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Here's a short (one-mission) arc from me:

Arc Name: Females for Hire
Arc ID: 110723
Faction: Either
Creator Global/Forum Name: suedenim
Difficulty Level: Medium/Low
Synopsis:
What you see is what you get... with Females for Hire!

Meet Paragon City's fastest-growing all-girl, all-stereotype mercenary group. Studies have shown that over 95% of all mercenary hiring managers are men... so Females for Hire consciously plays to male stereotypes of "action girl" operatives, while maintaining top-notch professionalism.

You're playing with fire... with Females for Hire! From Independent International Pictures. Rated PG.
Estimated Time to Play: Short, single mission.

Fun new custom group, a bit of mystery, a bit of humor. Very loosely inspired by this wonderfully cheesy radio ad for a '70s B-Movie.


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"What you see is what you get", heh not exactly. I thought this was a pretty well done arc. Interesting story, well balanced and interesting looking custom group. Ran as a solo lvl 39 fire/fire Brute. I thought the objectives were well done with good clues and an interesting hook which I won't spoil for everyone else out there. I did think there were a couple of jokes about it that were bordering on the edge of bad taste, but I think for the most part it was handled quite well without being derogatory. I enjoyed it.

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Thanks, glad you liked it! And after thinking about it, I changed one of the jokes to something a less vulgar and on-the-nose to a joke about silly stereotypes.

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I *may* have oversold the difficulty of the last mission. It just has an Elite Boss, and I may have erred on the side of caution, in that all EBs are supposed to be fairly tough to solo. You do have help from Ashley Porter herself in the mission.


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I don't think you oversold it, the warning was good to have in, IMO. I figured the warning was due to an EB, and I don't worry much about soloing EBs with most ATs, it was more a case of facing an EB and expecting more of those knockback heavy 5th column guys, that I really did not want to take on while fighting an EB.

I expect if I'd brought a KB resistant toon I probably would not have even noticed any problem with the 5th column guys.

Don't have anywhere to post screenshots online yet. I'll have to do that one day soon.

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The Germans actually are out of the picture in the final mission, all either captured or slinking off to lick their wounds after the gorilla guerilla debacle - it's just mind-controlled Gorillas and a Lobster Man from Mars.

I might change the warning dialogue to something like "Reckon you might want to bring along some extra help, but, heck, I ignore that kind of advice most of the time, and things usually work out OK."

I used a... Mercy Island, I think? map for the last mission of "Ashley Porter and the Gorilla War," though I don't think it's called that. Relatively small map, features a dock area, I think it's used for one of the early "Snake" missions in CoV?

Anyway, that map actually has a pretty good rundown Mitteleuropa feel to it. I was surprised how plausible it felt as a rundown Uzbek harbor town on the Aral Sea circa 1941 (if you overlook the Arachnos recruiting posters, anyway.)

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A hologram, similar to the holodeck from star trek.

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Or so we're told, anyway. Given the sponsors of the project, any number of "alternative" explanations seem possible, and in fact likely.

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Arc Name: Ashley Porter and the Gorilla War
Arc ID: 130809
Faction: Heroic (or, perhaps, anti-fascist villains in 1941.)
Creator Global/Forum Name: suedenim
Difficulty Level: Medium. Not intended to be super-difficult, but be warned, there is an Elite Boss at the end.
Tags: [SFMA][HRMA][MWMA]
Synopsis:
An adaptation of the classic 1938 film Ashley Porter and the Gorilla War (see also: Ashley Porter Diamond Anniversary Special.)

Ashley Porter, the famed Western heroine, has stabled her trusty black mare, Shadow, for the duration of the war, as she leads an all-girl aviation commando team, the Blackhorse Squadron. And "Lady Blackhorse" needs your help, because the Uzbek Lowland Gorillas are revolting!

(No, no, not like the fellas in the Spanish Civil War. The big primates.)

All-out military action in the classic Ashley Porter style, featuring the Blackhorse Squadron, the sinister Germans of Abwehr Section 2, the Red Army, and Uzbek Gorilla Partisans!

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I tried to play this arc. I ended up quitting without rating it when mission 4 told me I might need a team. Up to that point it had been, quite frankly, a grind for me. Good story, but I did not like the missions. Someone else needs to review this. I will post some observations I made, though.


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Thanks for the feedback. I *may* have oversold the difficulty of the last mission. It just has an Elite Boss, and I may have erred on the side of caution, in that all EBs are supposed to be fairly tough to solo. You do have help from Ashley Porter herself in the mission.

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I liked the story, and the npc dialogues were well done. This one in the first mission confused me a little though:

Monique Dutourd: Que vous êtes tres courageux, to fact the finest swordswoman in all France!

I'm assuming that's supposed to be "to face"? Given her scripting and description, I did get a hilarious screenshot after she was defeated, though. Ragdoll physics is so much fun.

In mission 2 the second paragraph of the opening dialogue talks about the "normally peaceful lowland guerrillas", I'm sure that one was supposed to say "gorillas".


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Dangit. Yes, you're absolutely correct on both counts, and this is yet another example of why everybody needs a proofreader/editor, even if they think they don't.

I'd love to see that screenshot, btw, if you put it up on imageshack or something....

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Another problem was the lack of description text on all but the Boss NPCs. To me, a 5-star arc should have all the details filled in.


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Yeah, I agree in principle, but I was *right* up against the file size limit. Which I still don't quite get - is disk space *that* huge a consideration, or is it some other factor?

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I did not much care for the initiation test that was the basis of mission 1. To me, that would have been better suited to a small, linear map rather than an outdoor map. It gave me the feel of a "run around and kill things for no real reason" mission.


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That seems to be the general consensus. I figured it being a relatively small outdoor map with lots of water, along with the "click to end the mission" glowie, would reduce the annoyance factor. Also, I discovered that there were spawning bugs if I tried to have all the Bosses out at the same time.

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Mission 2 was another outdoor map, but I loved the large number of patrols running around. Since I actually hate those outdoor maps, I ended up turning on stealth and flying, and I really enjoyed watching the three factions running into each other and getting into fights all the time. You do have to fly around to appreciate that though.


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That's the feel I was aiming for, a big, crazy, four-sided battle.

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Mission 3 was, for me, terrible. Your choice of using only the 5th column lt's ended up making every spawn a knockback fest - Get shot, get knocked back, grenade throw follow-up, get knocked back, run up and kick me, get knocked down - and when three of them are doing it to you at the same time you're watching most of the fight from the ground.

Yes, I could and did beat them, but, to me, it was more of a grind than fun.


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Hmm, that I didn't expect, I tend to think of the 5th Column "foot soldier" types as one of the easier mook-level opponent groups. Maybe I just have characters who resist knockback well, and don't notice it much? (Was knockback toned down for the equivalent Council guys?)

There are also, as in the 2nd mission, a bunch of Gorilla and Blackhorse patrols and battles to wear down the Germans, but I ratcheted those down a touch after early feedback that they hardly left anything for the players to do....

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Since I didn't finish it, I won't rate it, but maybe something of the above will be of use to the author.

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Thanks, I do appreciate the feedback!

Lots of good advice here. One thing I hadn't given much thought to were the possibilities for "object" objectives, making them non-required and providing flavor.

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I think people are missing the point of posting a critic of a mission arc, THEN posting an arc to be reviewed. Not just jump in and dump an arc.

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Yes, and it also tends to result in people who follow the rules being skipped, or at least it does for me.

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ok. this was an ok arc. there are multiple problems that i saw. one common problem in arcs is original justification. it is not exactly clear as to why the hero corps would send me to the clockwork first to do what ends up being their dirty work. why are you sent there? what is the motivation?

in your synopsis you mention that the hero corps asked you, but that his not really clear until the mission entry pop-up. your synopsis does not really fit what is happening in the story. are you investigating the clockwork for hero corps? or does hero corps want you to help the clockwork for whatever reason and they are double crossing you and hero corps?

these are questions that you do not need to answer to me, but they should become clear to the player initially or as they go along.


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I meant to mention this myself, but I largely agree. I also see that it's a difficult problem to remedy, because you can only have one contact. (AFAIK, there's no way to bounce characters back and forth between contacts, the way Indigo and Crimson do at various times in the normal missions.)

You have to explain the "undercover" premise in the arc advertisement, because obviously the Clockwork contact doesn't know about it. And you could make a Hero Corps person the contact, but then you lose the fun of the peculiar little Clockwork guy.

A thought just occurs to me, though, maybe you could add some colored text to the initial dialogue, and indicate that it's the character's "thought balloons?" Then lay out the undercover premise there.

Incidentally, I think this arc *might* push a button with some players that I've seen people get riled up about: the arc where the player is required to do stupid things that let her be used/abused/trapped by the bad guys. Personally, I don't think that's a valid criticism in this case, as the "undercover" premise covers that sort of thing. Undercover agents often have to make compromises to get or stay close to the situation, and if the character just says "no," the good guys won't learn about the Clockwork plan.

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Arc Name: The Clockwork Crusade
Arc ID: 126073
Faction: Arachnos, Vahzilok, Council, Clockwork
Creator Global/Forum Name: @YanYan
Difficulty Level: Easy to Moderate, designed to be solo able by any AT
Mission Levels: 1-20
Synopsis: Hero Corps has asked you for some unique help. Seems the Clockwork are making some strange attacks against other villains. They've asked you to 'assist' them under cover.
Estimated Time to Play: 30 Minutes to an Hour.


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I enjoyed this arc, played it solo with my level 12 Psi/Psi Blaster on Heroic, and most of the bad parts were simply part of playing level 12 characters (lots of misses, End problems, etc....) Never died, but came close a couple times, which suggests it's just about right as far as difficulty.

A very cool idea at the root of the arc, and I liked the new custom villain designs. The only thing that's maybe a problem is the three run-up missions, which are understandably a little generic, and while "defeat all" missions *do* make sense for the arc, they still can be a little tedious. I'd consider putting the Council/Office mission in particular in a smaller map. Near the end of that one, I was getting impatient to get back to figuring out what the Clockwork are up to.

Minor "bug" type thing: Probably not much that can be done about it (and it happens in "official" missions a lot too), but in the Vahzilok mission, dialogue was often spoken by Abominations.

It's a good arc, and I gave it 4 stars, but I thought it lacked the "oomph" or something extra required to really put it over the top. I'd like to see a sequel, though, with the new Clockwork models!

And here's my newest arc:
Arc Name: Ashley Porter and the Gorilla War
Arc ID: 130809
Faction: Heroic (or, perhaps, anti-fascist villains in 1941.)
Creator Global/Forum Name: suedenim
Difficulty Level: Medium. Not intended to be super-difficult, but be warned, there is an Elite Boss at the end.
Tags: [SFMA][HRMA][MWMA]
Synopsis:
An adaptation of the classic 1938 film Ashley Porter and the Gorilla War (see also: Ashley Porter Diamond Anniversary Special.)

Ashley Porter, the famed Western heroine, has stabled her trusty black mare, Shadow, for the duration of the war, as she leads an all-girl aviation commando team, the Blackhorse Squadron. And "Lady Blackhorse" needs your help, because the Uzbek Lowland Gorillas are revolting!

(No, no, not like the fellas in the Spanish Civil War. The big primates.)

All-out military action in the classic Ashley Porter style, featuring the Blackhorse Squadron, the sinister Germans of Abwehr Section 2, the Red Army, and Uzbek Gorilla Partisans!

In my 1941-set Ashley Porter and the Gorilla War, the two Nazi bad guys are named Major Wolfgang Hochstetter and Colonel Albert Burkhalter, from Hogan's Heroes (and what's even sadder, I followed the timeline that had Burkhalter only promoted to general after the show's pilot.)

On top of that, their organization is "Abwehr Section 2," from the "Silent Storm" games. And the U.S. Army Intelligence officer named in text is "Colonel Darnell," who was Steve Trevor's boss in Golden Age Wonder Woman stories....

"It's not what a movie is about, it's how it is about it."
— Roger Ebert

You can get to a semi-adequate facsimile of the Sky Raiders if you don't look too close. Or at least something that looks like it's from the game general style or an offshoot.

If it makes sense for the character/story, he could always be "phased," a la Phase/Shift powers. Nemesis, for instance, could plausibly do something like that.

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Melee only bosses do seem to be rather chicken if you kite them. Or smart, depending on how you look at it. Although the latest patch to test apparently gave all melee sets a ranged attack, so no more risk-free EB kills for Blasters.

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Oh, that's good. The typical pattern I encountered with Super Strength bosses is that they run for a good long while, then suddenly do a Hurl ranged attack. I wonder if I was just out-ranging the boss until I got close enough for Hurl range? But then again, don't critters all have ranges that far, far exceed a player character's range?

Cut and paste is the least fussy way to do it. I saw an arc that had Japanese characters, which was pretty neat.

Getting to more difficult possibilities, I don't suppose Kryptonese or Interlac are options? I could use some sort of truly "alien" looking text that isn't just Dingbats or something.

I don't have anything like that, though. Just arrows, trip mines, and caltrops, basically....

I was wondering whether it was some sort of exaggerated reaction to Caltrops, but I've seen it happen when the boss didn't even come near the caltrops or trip mines, too.

Seems like it happens a lot on outdoor maps in particular, not so much in the others.

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I kind of have the opposite problem.

I want the first mission of an arc to be a sort of "training mission," in which you face the team that will be your allies for the rest of the arc - several bosses in sequence. I don't think it'll be *too* hard (they're just Bosses, not EBs), but don't want someone having to repeatedly beat their head against the wall if they fail. Plus, if they *do* get killed, it'd be nice to have that be an automatic "mission fails but no harm done, just a training mission."

Doesn't seem to be any easy way to do this, though.

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"Touch the VR console to end the simulation."

Put it in the front of the map on a decently long timer, and the (all entirely optional) bosses in the middle and back.

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Hmm, that's not a bad idea, I might do that. Thanks!

I've been noticing this odd trend in both my own and other people's missions, and I'm not sure if it's an MA bug or what.

Very often, Bosses seem to run like hell in the middle of a fight, even if they're not set to run. And even if it doesn't make much sense, like a melee specialist trying to run away from my archer, which is like her ideal fight....

I kind of have the opposite problem.

I want the first mission of an arc to be a sort of "training mission," in which you face the team that will be your allies for the rest of the arc - several bosses in sequence. I don't think it'll be *too* hard (they're just Bosses, not EBs), but don't want someone having to repeatedly beat their head against the wall if they fail. Plus, if they *do* get killed, it'd be nice to have that be an automatic "mission fails but no harm done, just a training mission."

Doesn't seem to be any easy way to do this, though.

I've noticed that in some places, a simple carriage return is considered "improperly formatted HTML." Apparently, enemy "Info" boxes have to be one paragraph, no matter what.

Particularly if you're using a somewhat "unusual" map, try changing it and see what happens. I was using the "Malta/Warburg" map and having a lot of trouble getting bosses to spawn, but I think it's a problem with that particular map.

And there's also the ages-old heroic exchange:

"Careful, Batman, it might be a trap!"
"Of course it's a trap! But this is our best chance to get to the bottom of all this, Robin!"

My problem with the ambushes was that I didn't realize they *were* ambushes.

I saw all these red bolts passing over my head as I was peppering the boss with arrows, and thought "Oh, good, more help." Took me a while to figure out that they were just misses....

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Vanity Arcs - We know you have a Villain or a Hero. That's nice. So do we.


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One of the biggest attractions of this system is to be able to run your character's origin stories in actuality rather than just in your head. That's not exactly a vanity story.

Unless you mean specifically those stories that over the top "look at my character and how awesome they are".

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I've so far published one and am working on a couple other arcs that happen to involve some of my characters. I don't think this is a bad thing in and of itself. I don't include my characters because they're my characters. I include my characters because I think they either have, or can contribute to, a story worth telling. I don't consider that vanity any more than I consider it vanity for any other author to write a story about characters he created.

That said, I do take pains not to let any of my characters overshadow the player. The player is the protagonist after all, even if I'm using the arc as a means to convey my character's story. I'm not too proud to let my creations play second fiddle to--or get beaten up by--the player (though, as with any good comic book hero or villain, it can generally be expected that they'll live to fight another day).

I'm not sure I had a point with all that. But if I did, I guess it's that while vanity arcs most certainly exist, the presence of a character the author actually plays doesn't make something a vanity arc. I'm not sure if anyone was suggesting it did. But I figured it was worth saying anyway.

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Yeah. It can be tricky, and there are some traps to watch out for. This is true of all kinds of fiction writing, incidentally (or tabletop RPGs, for that matter), where the writer naturally will develop an affection for her characters.

One thing that's very good to do in writing is to work out character backgrounds thoroughly and thoughtfully. The more you know about where a character comes from, the better you'll be able to write him. Where did he go to college? What were his favorite courses? If he's at a party, what will he be drinking? Does he follow baseball? Hockey? What are his favorite teams? Etc.

That's all very good to work out. But what's very bad is when the writer thinks all of that background material has to come out on the printed page. If it's not relevant to the story (this story, the one you're telling now) in some way, just let it inform you, but the reader doesn't need or want to see it.

The problem with "vanity stories" more often than not isn't the fact that it's about the writer's own character. The problem is when the writer treats it as an excuse to go off on a "Let me tell you about my character" monologue. Which if you've ever encountered in real life without some avenue of retreat, you know can be one of the most excruciating things in the world.

So in short, don't be the guy yammering about everything his 18th level D&D character has ever done, in a campaign his audience never played in.

What are the various things that can trigger mission failure (as opposed to "you can go to the hospital and come back repeatedly until you succeed?")

I know there's the time limit option, but what else?