Steelclaw
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Well, seven is supposed to be a lucky number isn't it?
How about a humor video centered around a lot of in-game luck?
Video starts with character finding a Luck inspiration only this one glows and seems much more powerful. The character pops it and things start happening... all the best aspects of the game start going right for the character all of a sudden..
* gets all the Luck of the Gambler drops, in order, from each member of the spawn he's facing...
* finds a temp item (gun most likely) that turns out to be a one-shot Hamidon killer
* happens to walk in just as a team has finished destroying the entire group of Lord Recluse's posse in Recluse's Victory but as the last of the actual defeating team teleports out up walks Statesman who gives the lucky character all the accolades and credit for the win..
And so on... of course at the end we can go sappy and sentimental and show him standing in Atlas Park... another hero walks up to him and greets him... then another... a slow draw back shot shows the entire area filled with heroes... all talking... emoting and basically interacting with one another... the final fade to black and we see the message... "Yeah... come to think of it... we're ALL pretty darned lucky... aren't we?... Thanks to the Devs for 7 wonderful years..."
Or something like that. -
Quote:True story... I was shoveling my driveway this morning and noticed that the drifts had left some areas practically bare but others under some three feet of snow...Originally Posted by Desi_Nova
...you See the driveway that needs to be shoveld and you wish you had blazing aura
I literally stood there going "Hmm... okay right here is Atlas Park, that area over there is more like Steel Canyon... uh oh... then there's the place at the end of the drive way where the plows stacked up four feet of hard packed snow, ice and sand... yep... Rikti War Zone..."
And besides... you don't want Blazing Aura.. you want to be a Fire Controller with Fire Imps... that way you don't even have to leave the house. -
Fine... since it won't die I may as well help it live...
* You hear someone mention the plural of a certain naughty bit and immediately think they're a fellow player.
* You hear a WWII story of how the Germans stormed the front line riding tanks and wonder if they were on their shoulders or piggy-back.
* You read a newspaper article about something called a Public Defender and think he must get on ALL the PUGs.
* You take a vacation to New York City and, upon seeing the Statue of Liberty, your first thought is "Pffft... Only ONE?"
* You start referring to your teen-age son's room as Boomtown.
* When your wife mentions your next Anniversary and asks what you'd like to do during it you answer "Play, of course!" before realizing she meant Wedding Anniversary.
* When the Groundhog sees its shadow you think "awesome! One more month of the Winter Event!"
* You go to see your brand new nephew in the hospital, and upon seeing how homely he is, immediately start setting traps for Snaptooth.
* Your wife starts killing her own spiders because she's tired of you screaming "We shall thwart thee Lord Recluse!" and attempting to organize the family into a task force.
* They turn your electricity off after your fourth attempt to pay the bill with influence.
* At your divorce hearing you tell the judge "I was a vigilante when I did that, but I'm back to being full hero... I swear! Check my info window!"
* At your divorce hearing you tell the judge "Ignored her for four years? Listen man, I saved the world 1,394 times during those four years! Don't you think that makes her complaints just a LITTLE on the selfish side?"
* You can make a list of jokes about CoH/V on just about any subject... practically at will... in your sleep... with your frontal lobe tied behind your back.
* You don't remember important personal or family history by dates anymore. "Yeah, he was a great baby. We had him around Issue 10. Tell ya, man, if he was crying I could hold him in my arms while I played. One Rikti Invasion was enough to put him right back to sleep."
* Your kids want to go trick or treating but you won't let them go until you make sure the kids they're going with have the right ATs for survivability.
* Your eight year old son wants to go trick or treating as Batman this year and you punish him by making him wear a blue unitard with "GENERIC 0005461265" on the chest.
* During the long time period between the end of the Spring Event and the beginning of the Halloween Event you refuse to acknowledge any holidays... even the one with the fireworks.
* Your wife managed to get you to watch the first few episodes of Lost with her but eventually stopped insisting due to your constant screams of "Nemesis! It's so OBVIOUS!"
* In the middle of the night you have woken up cuddled next to your television set muttering "one mission... c'mon.. just one mission. I always liked you more than Radio..."
* You don't surf for pron on the internet anymore.. but you DO spend a lot of time in the costume creator.
* You use a cable modem, which means it's a shared resource with your neighbors so will slow down when they're all on the net... you read the notice about double xp weekend.. and the day of the event the front page of the paper reads "Mass Modem Heist Puzzles Neighborhood!"
* You wrote a fanfic about you at a pottery wheel with Ghost Widow standing behind you.
* When your wife gets pregnant she spends an entire day on Paragon Wiki getting all the names of characters from the game to make a list to compare your "suggestions" against.
* You adopt two cats and name them Stefan and Marcus. You're very disappointed when they get along just fine. -
I got nothin'.
Never been very good at this sort of thing. -
::The old man totters out onto the stage. In the darkness beyond it, where presumably there stands an audience, only silence greets him interupted by the occassional cold and flu season discreet cough. The old man shuffles along towards the microphone, pausing only once to hitch up his pants. When he reaches the mic he glances around blearily then begins his prepared reply.::
You say you want the Doomcriers to stop. You say you want us to no longer complain or prophecy ultimate failure in what others attempt.
FREEDOM OF SPEECH DOOOOOOOOOOOM!!
I say before you now that we Doomcriers have held our place in history with pride! I say to you that without us the gears of history would have shuddered and stopped long ago! We are the squeaky wheel that gets the grease! We are the irritant that causes the oyster to make a pearl just to shut us up!
When Christopher Columbus said he'd find a shorter trade route to India a Doomcrier was there to tell him he'd never make it! And he didn't! That's right, you can thank a Doomcrier for the discovery of America you young whippersnapper!
When the Founding Fathers sat down to hammer out a government we Doomcriers kept telling them it wouldn't work. It was our constant complaining and pessimism that kept them hammering away at checks and balances until they gave up and said it was good enough.
And you know what? Danged thing STILL doesn't work!
If they'd listened to us, dang nabbit, maybe we'd actually have a government that didn't vote itself pay raises when the rest of the country was in a recession!
Don't dare discount the Doomcriers! Without us you'd have shoddy workmanship in everything you buy. Without us there's be no improvements, advances or dangerous product recalls. Without the Doomcriers you'd still be driving a Pinto and praying not to get hit by the other drivers because auto insurance wasn't mandatory and health insurance didn't exist in the first place!
::So vehement was his diatribe that he takes a moment to smooth his hair and tuck back in his shirt which had come loose during his gesticulations. He takes a deep breath and concludes.:
'Sides... if you complain about us... you just became one of us. Now get the hell outta my yard.
::He turns and totters off the stage.:: -
I'll give 'er a go.
I like really complex systems. That's why I create my spreadsheets and run my tournaments. Simple things bore me. The more complicated and inter-woven a system is the more I like it. So, if I were going to re-vamp the Gladiator system I would turn it into a strategy game of sorts.
1) All Gladiators are divided into groups by Origin: Magic, Mutation, Natural, Science and Tech. Each group has roughly the same number of Gladiators and each has powerful ones and not-so-powerful ones.
2) Gladiators are improvable but NOT through a leveling-up system. Each Gladiator has a pre-determined number of slots into which power ups can be fitted prior to battle. So, your Mook could be a relatively low power character but have five slots available for improving them while a Night Widow would start out as very powerful naturally but only have one or even no improvement slots.
3) Minor power ups can be purchased with inf at any arena. Such Power Ups may include regeneration boosts, endurance boosts, minor defense boosts, etc. Basically combat improvements that increase survival and battle capability. Purchased power ups are one-shot only. This also creates another inf sink to spend your hard earned cash on.
4) More powerful power ups are earned as recipe drops. Gladiator Recipes are given as rewards for defeating other Gladiators (whether you win the match or not) or as purchasable items via Reward Merits and/or Alignment Merits. These power ups may include things like new powers, increased attack speed, self-sacrifice detonation abilities and so on. They would use invention salvage and be crafted as normal recipes.
5) Energy Crystals are given to each player prior to battle. These Crystals are Origin Specific; they drain power from those of Origins other than their own and grant that power to those with the correct Origin. Consider this a blanket buff/debuff for all combat attributes within the effective range. Players can place their Crystal where ever they wish on the Arena map.
6) Maps, maps and more maps. Players can now hold their arena battles on ANY map available via AE. They can also opt to hold a Gladiator battle in the base of one of the competitors. This is only a representation of the base, so no damage done is done to the actual base.
7) Objectives. Yes, players can opt to just set their minions loose and watch them hack and slash but they can also choose from a myriad of other options. Capture the Flag is an option. Or multiple targets like a Patrol mission where all have to be reached before the game ends. Perhaps a version of King of the Hill where one holds the hill and the other player sends challengers until he takes it where upon it becomes the first player's turn to do the same. Capture and hold each room (which turns different colors on the map depending on which team Captain holds it). Oh, and none of this is limited to two player. Eight player King of the Hill or Capture the Map would be interesting.
8) Commands would be upgraded so you can program the AI of your individual Gladiators. Nothing too complicated; something like Patrol, Guard, Stealth, Aggressive, Find and Report, Set Up Ambush, that sort of thing. You examine the map, consider your goals and assign tasks to your minions. Each Gladiator has a quick key assigned to it so you can send the camera to it immediately or have it follow along on autopilot. You can change commands on the fly should your strategy fail or should an opportunity present itself.
9) Possession. You can infiltrate and directly command any of your Gladiators. The advantage to doing this is that Gladiator is imbued with powers from the Leadership pool (not Vengeance). You have access to the Gladiator's attacks and gain what advantage you can from not being restricted to a basic AI command. The disadvantage is every other one of your minions is on their own and your camera is tied to the one you are possessing so you can't oversee the entire effort. General or Warrior; it's up to you.
10) Customization. I would also set some system up by which you can mix and match your own rule systems. We can do this with AE, so why not with the Arena matches? You want a match where all of your fallen Gladiators are resurrected back at your base but there's a hostage in the map who will negate this power for every other team should one team manage to get her in range of their Energy Crystal? Go for it. You want to create an item of power that will summon a horde of Rikti Monkeys to fight on the side of whoever clicks it first? Why not? Combining AE functionality with Gladiatorial combat could be interesting.
I have a lot of other ideas, but I think this list is long enough. Like I said, heh, I love complexity. -
For the fun of it I put the recent Producer Letter through my handy-dandy Steelclaw Translat-O-Tron 5000. Once the smoke and the smell of burnt cabbage cleared, this is what it oozed out.
Quote:Thanks a lot, Jess... You skipped town and left me with all your accumulated errors and mistakes to either fix or eventually be assigned blame for. With leet blame-shifting skills like this, you are destined for CEO greatness... or possibly a career in politics. But, as long as you've saddled me with it, I might as well get this over with...Thanks, Jesse! I'm proud to fill your shoes and lead the charge into 2011 and beyond. Without further ado, here is my first Producer's letter:
We've got some great stuff planned for 2011. I'd love to tell you all of the amazing things in the works but there's this Marketing Enforcer standing over me with a pair of brass knuckles and a friendly smile. He said something about getting my family's address out of my emergency contact information.Quote:2011 is upon us and at Paragon Studios we can’t be more excited about what we’re working on; I’d love to tell you all of the amazing stuff we have coming up, but I wouldn’t want to spoil all the surprises.
It is my hope to use these Producer Letters to get help from the outside world. Perhaps a free-form algorithm or massive word scramble. If one of the players can crack the code they can get in here and rescue me! WarWitch has been threatening me with PohSyb bathing duties!Quote:Suffice it to say that this is some of the best content we have yet put into the game. I am looking forward to using these Producer Letters to give you a sense of where we are and where we are going--as a team and as a game, for this year and beyond.
Over the past couple years, the bosses here have started expecting actual results if we want to keep our jobs. Taking naps and mailing it in is no longer accepted. Oh, and did you know the Grandfather Law doesn't apply to job expectations?Quote:Unparalleled Content: Over the past couple of years, we have really challenged ourselves at Paragon Studios to develop better and better content.
We want you to see the the game world and your character from new dramatic angles. That's why I am pushing new Random Camera Angle Action. You want drama? Try targeting the boss enemy during epic battles with the camera spinning wildly and ending up trapped behind a wall!Quote:We want to give everyone the chance to try new things and use their powers in new ways. We want you to see the game world and your character from new dramatic angles.
Incarnate Trials will be loads of fun for the players who work hard and max out their incarnate abilities. But it will be loads of LAUGHS for the development team as well! We've included a subroutine that detects any Incarnate Trial being run by characters with no actual Incarnate abilities. All such attempts will be simulcast to the NCSoft Employee break room.Quote:With the upcoming Incarnate Trials, you’re going to be able to take your characters to power levels undreamt (Power! I tell you! muahahaha) and really see some of the most exciting gameplay we’ve ever been able to create.
In 2011 we will be introducing dozens of new Booster Packs to satisfy every possible costume desire/fetish your greedy little hearts desire. We're even going to include NPC Booster Packs that will let you change the appearance of enemy groups on your PC! Want the Carnival of Shadows to look like the Rockettes? Want to dress up Malta as your favorite NFL team? Also in 2011 we'll be introducing the new NCSoft Line of Credit for those of you who may not be able to afford all our great Boosters up front!Quote:We’ve also dramatically improved the art, with some of the best animations, effects, audio, characters, and environments we’ve ever produced; early this year, we’re going to be giving you a pretty “wild” new look, and later this year we’ll turn up the pressure.
That's right! We're FINALLY taking full advantage of Ouroboros!Quote:The Future Is Now:
Going Rogue and Issue 19 were all a long set up for 2011. You didn't see it coming. You just stood there kissing your girlfriend in the middle of the spooky abandoned summer camp all unaware. You didn't feel the deepening of the shadows. You didn't hear the suspenseful oo-oo-oo-ah-ah-ah music building in the background. You didn't listen to the wierd old guy when he told you about the legend of the deranged child who was drowned in the lake after eating the orphans before being cursed by the gypsy woman who was born of an insane nun.Quote:The features we have brought you in the game over the last year are just the first steps on a voyage to bigger, better, shinier, much more exciting things in 2011 and beyond. Going Rogue set up the world of Praetoria. Issue 19 introduced the Incarnate system and some of our most challenging content to date.
Remember the Incarnate slots and all that? We got all that done in 2010. ALL OF IT. We decided to release it in dribs and drabs through out '11. That's right, we're taking the year off! SUCKAHS!Quote:Issue 20 will unleash the Incarnate Trials that bring you even more raw power courtesy of the next levels of Incarnate abilities. Issue 21 will continue to develop these storylines and features in new and thrilling ways. All the great things we are producing take you steps, leaps, and superleaps closer to the resolution of an epic storyline, and we want your characters to help lead that journey.
Please insert another quarter to continue.Quote:End Game for All:
Well, everyone able to pay the monthly subscription fee anyway.Quote:We have always wanted to provide a game that was open to everyone.
We want you to feel powerful when you visit our world, and to this end we are encouraging street sweeping in a zone you've already out-leveled. The Incarnate Trials, on the other hand, are going to make you cry like a newborn baby who just got b**ch slapped awake by the doctor. Belonging to elitist "raiding guilds" won't help you because they'll be crying even harder than you since they had further to fall. You remember that guy you always hated playing AD&D with? The sadist who created nothing but killer dungeons and laughed when your favorite character died to a kobold? We hired him.Quote:We want you to feel powerful when you visit our world, and the Incarnate Trials will be inclusive, accessible, and easy to participate in. Not to say that it isn’t some of the most challenging and exciting content we have ever provided, but we want to make it possible for you to participate in easily, without the need to belong to an elitist “raiding guild” and without surrendering your weekends for a small chance at rolling on a random reward.
We're going to release the Rare and Very Rare tiers of the Alpha Slot in just a few short weeks to give you a false sense of confidence before you try out the Incarnate Trial. You'll note we called it the Incarnate TRIAL; not the Incarnate Walk-In-The-Park.Quote:Now that many of you have begun your ascension to Incarnate, we’ll be releasing the Rare and Very Rare tiers of the Alpha Slot in just a few short weeks to help you get a leg up on the launch of Issue 20.
Smiles gained through only the very best in used-car-salesman training seminars.Quote:Service with a Smile:
We've found it easier to update old content and pass it off as working hard to improve your game experience. To this end we will be revamping the Atlas Park Sewer Run! Yes, the old classic way to get to level 10 quick and easy will be undergoing a content upgrade! What will the new Sewer Run look like? Got three words for ya: MORE!! RIKTI!! MONKEYS!!Quote:In recent years we’ve worked hard to not just give you all ever-more-engaging content, but also to continue to improve everyone’s overall experience playing City of Heroes and Villains. Often this comes from updating old content but also in improvements to the way you interact with the game.
We are loading City of Heroes into the new NCSoft Launcher. I tell ya, before I could only fling one of those CoH CDs around fifty feet. Now with that Launcher I can put one through the door of a '93 Accord from 500 yards. Yeah, Lou from accounting still won't talk to me... sheesh.. crybaby... it's not like he lost the leg or anything.Quote:For example, we are currently working to integrate City of Heroes into the NCsoft Launcher, which will bring with it a significant improvement to the process of downloading and updating the game for all NA and EU (Mac and PC) customers. One of the immediate benefits is that all of our customers will finally benefit from the same launcher and the most up-to-date information; this is the first step in bringing our communities together.
You women can go to hell.Quote:Love You, Man:
At least the male ones are.Quote:I want to make it clear that you, the players, are the most important aspect of City Of…,
See? Told ya.Quote:and we want you guys to know this.
See? I'm even stealing things from a woman. Seriously, how clear do I have to be?Quote:I am committed to giving you insight into where we are going, what we are doing, and how AWESOME it’s going to be (to steal a favorite word from War Witch).
And trust me, we've been keeping a LONG list of all you forumites who have been specially whiny or annoying this past year. You will be eliminated, slowly and painfully. Gold plated Steelclaw my purple speckled a**.Quote:With the pure ambition of Issues 18, 19, 20, and 21, I know we’ve been focused on development and a little quieter than usual on the forums, but that doesn’t mean we haven’t been listening.
We want you to have an active voice in where we are going -- because we've come to learn that your voices are going to be da**ed active whether we want them to be or not. We'll tell you more at PAX East... maybe that will get you to quiet down a little bit... at least until then... at which time we'll tell you about our exciting new CoH Bean Dip recipe... or something.Quote:We want you to have an active voice in where we are going--you wanted the Incarnate System to be more epic, and thus was Issue 19 born. You wanted more info on the Praetorian incarnation of Hamidon, and we’ll be giving you more, starting at PAX East this year.
Bean dip. Seriously! Your tastebuds will be tap dancing. Swear!Quote:No, I Mean It:
As the development team's New Year's Resolution, we have drawn straws to see who is going to actually go in to the Lion's Den and talk to you animals. Such "brave" souls will not only risk your disfavor and the slimy touch of your fan-boy fingers, but must endure the constant panic of saying the wrong thing or releasing the wrong info and getting fired by our Marketing Dept! Dark Watcher and The Television were two who got the short straws. Their subsequent resignations were NOT accepted.Quote:As the development team’s New Year’s Resolution, we are going to be even more active with all of you through the forums, Facebook, dev diaries, and Q&As about the Incarnate Trials, Lore, and all the great features we have in development. You’ll see more interaction with the old hands like Dark Watcher and The Television, as well as from some of the fantastic new talent you may not have met yet.
We'll also be bringing you some rewards for your continued loyalty, like Double XP Weekend! We shall also be making that weekend a free renewal weekend so we can reward our... umm... disloyal... players as well... wait, what?Quote:We’ll also be bringing you some rewards for your continued loyalty, like Double XP “Weekend” from January 27-31, and keep your eyes peeled for an announcement next week on plans for our seventh anniversary this spring.
Thanks for paying my salary!Quote:Thanks for your continued support, your continued participation, and for being the best gaming community in this dimension.
I want nothing more than to read every single idea for the game that you've ever come up with! No matter how many times it's already been suggested in the forums. No matter how ridiculous or silly. No matter even if you are the only person in the known world who would ever want such a thing as a Collander Helmet That Sprays Streams of Water Out of Every Hole. Just write down those ideas and send them to me! You can reach me at my global... @WarWitch.Quote:As a long-time player of City of Heroes before I joined Paragon, I know how fantastic the people are who play this game. I want to use these producer’s letters to stay in touch with you, so please feel free to respond with topics you’d like for me to address in the future.
This has been yet another successful translation from the Steelclaw Translat-O-Tron 5000.
I keed, I keeeed. -
Quote:You keep using that word... I do not think it means what you think it means.Originally Posted by rmthornton
My boyfriend was having the same problems. I wonder if he regrets introducing me to CoX....
-
In case of Wife-Aggro use these handy-dandy excuses for your team:
* Yeah guys, sorry... wife needs me... comes from NOT living in my mother's basement.
* Gotta go guys... Wife and I are up to Kama Sutra page 36... she's been working extra hard on her flexibility and I want to reward that sort of effort.
* Life (noun); the existence outside that of on-line gaming/fantasy world... used in a sentence "I have a life."
* Gotta go guys, my SG leader has just announced she wants to do a raid on my fortifications. She craves my Item of Power and will stop at nothing until it's firmly inside her base.
* Oooh... my wife just showed up and said she needs me to help her run a Click the Glowie mission... apparently she went to the local adult store and bought some interesting new Enhancements... later!
* See y'all... the MasterMind is leaving for a Safeguard mission and it's up to me to watch the Thug pets before they unleash Gang War on our living room.
* You know how no matter how you try the Minions keep running around aggroing the whole map and getting into trouble? The AI was modeled after my kids... gotta run.
* Hmmm... stay here in this PUG or go spend time with my wife... stay here with a Tank who ignores defensive powers or go cuddle with my lover on the couch... stay here with Sir Scrapper Lock and the Pink Ice Defender or try to convince my wife to put on the Sister Psyche costume I got her for our last anniversary?
PenHecked has quit the team. -
I still frequently risk death rather than just pop a medium or large inspiration.
Once my character reaches 30th level I refuse to keep small inspirations in my stack at all. Receive and pop all in the same moment.
I always take concept over effectiveness. I'll take a useless power if it fits with the idea I had for the character and I'll forgo an awesome one if it just doesn't seem to fit properly.
I still get the occassional goosebumps when I hear the Atlas Park theme music swell out of my speakers.
I'm still here. I'm still playing. And I'm still making lists and tournament changes about the game to which I'm addicted. -
Quote:Safety guidelines for the above action:Originally Posted by MrsAlphaOne
My husband was passed out cold (1am-3am labour/Delivery/midwife departure). I was on that post-birth adrenaline high, couldn't sleep, and I was starting to nurse my son. Now, that was my second kid, Staring at a nursing baby gets boring after a while, especially when one is doing it for about 45min at a kick. Grabbed my boppy pillow and ran a few missions.
Post labour insomnia + breastfeeding + sleeping husband = I need something to do or I'm going to go crazy with boredom.
* Do NOT play Rescue Baby New Year mission while attempting this; this mission has been known to destroy maternal instinct and cause rejection of anything resembling a child.
* When considering places to rest your drink the soft cranial cap is NOT an acceptable option.
* Playing the ITF post partem is not advised as too many correlations between Nictus infusion and getting pregnant exist for comfort.
* If you are feeling shut in the house and tied to the baby... if you are feeling like you never get OUT and your home has in fact become your prison... go talk to Positron... he can relate.
* No matter what your victory... no matter what odds you overcame to achieve that victory... spiking the "football" is not an acceptable celebration.
* If using a headset to verbally connect with your team mates, please keep the others in mind should your infant go from suckle-mode to Chew.
* No matter how hard you try, super sidekicking will NOT allow you to skip the baby past the diaper stage. -
Okay... for those of you whose wife plays as well...
* Do not deliberately pick a fight with your wife hoping that if you win the argument she might drop some leet PVP recipes.
* Borrowing cash from her purse is one thing; emailing influence from her heroes to yours is entirely different.
* Good: Getting a Luck of the Gambler drop you already have and selling the recipe at the market. Bad: Remembering your wife has that new Super Reflexes Scrapper two seconds after telling her about your luck.
* When explaining to her why you don't want to XP Share with her new character it is inadvisable to use the excuse that you have "Commitment issues."
* You make a tribute Defender in your wife's image and name. Good: You make her an empath because she cares deeply for others and gives them comfort and healing. Bad: You made her a Sonic Blast because when she's angry with someone she screams at them until they DIE. -
* When referring to the prior night's Hami Raid do not say "I spent some time with your mother last night..."
* Remembering Sister Psyche's birthday is impressive; forgetting your wife's is NOT.
* When negotiating spicing up the bedroom by having your wife dress up like the Carnival of Shadows never utter the statement "But the mask is the best part."
* A good wife will let you be late for dinner because you're on a mission team. A great wife will bring your dinner to you so you can grab a bite between battles. Caution is advised should you choose to push your luck by asking her to spoon feed you to keep your hands free in case of ambush.
* A quick ITF is not a reasonable excuse should your wife's water break.
* When having a conversation with your wife about which AT you would want to be in real life; it is never a good idea to say "Stalker."
* If however, your wife says she would want to be either a Thugs or Mercenary Mastermind with a faraway look and a strange smile on her face you are fully justified in asking why.
* When trying to convince your wife of doing something she doesn't want to try to avoid the statement "I bet your Praetorian self would do it."
* When discussing your children with other couples, do not make the mistake of slipping one of your characters into the conversation.
* Should you try to talk your wife into inviting another woman to your bed do not refer to it as a chance for her to try "Going Rogue."
* Never say to her "Of course you would make a good member of the Carnival of Shadows... I could see you as an illusionist... now your sister... SHE would make a good Ring Mistress..."
* Be VERY careful how you follow up the sentence "Hey honey, have you seen these new Hellion enemies the Girlfriend from Hell...?"
* If your wife ever says "They should erect a statue to ME in Atlas Park!" Never respond with "What do you think the blimp is for?"
* The proper noun to describe them is "Hydra" not "The In-Laws."
* She is not your maid. So never utter the statement "Living with you is like living in Boomtown."
* Suggesting to her that she would do well with Sister Psyche's powers is tolerable. Pointing out various women to her she could possess with such powers is not. -
* I didn't think they'd deliver the party balloons already filled with helium! How long we gotta hold these down anyway?
* The Council are weak! They take their breaks individually! The 5th Column practices team work in EVERY facet!
* Hey! You're right, the vibrate function IS worth the quarter!
* Now that you're all relaxed gentlemen, we shall begin our instruction. Lesson 1... Intimidation over all invading enemies is key. First impressions are everything.
* Okay so the music's stopped... who was eliminated? What...? AGAIN?! Johnson I told you to remove a seat between each round!
* Now that we are done with our breathing exercises let us begin with Dog Facing Upwards.
* We ask for recliners and get cardboard boxes? I'm tellin' you man, our Union Rep sucks! -
Quote:Leak! LEAK!! We signed a non-disclosure agreement!!Originally Posted by Dark_Respite
Er, no. I have too many other videos (The Most Interesting Man in Praetoria, CoVideoHell, The Wretch Strike Force, Game On, and umpteen music videos) that I want to work on, so Issue 20 will just have to get along without one. Besides, didn't you see the Holiday Event vid they did? Doesn't that give you hope that Issue 20's official vid will be awesome?
Michelle
aka
Samuraiko/Dark_Respite
Oh, wait... Only I signed it... in crayon...
Hmmmm...
Carry on. -
Quote:Yes... current Tournament rules are compatible with side-switching... it's just non-permanent/only long enough to snag badges/only allowed for level 50 characters side switching.Originally Posted by Chase_Arcanum
Umm... are your current tournament rules compatible with side switching? Just thinking that rule #3 might cause strife for rule #2 if it leads to some loopholes/exploits in the tourney process...
-
1) Actually sit down and create some of the AE arcs I've had swimming around in my mind.
2) Stick with THIS iteration of my tournament and NOT delete/recreate all my characters until at LEAST 2012.
3) Actually try this whole side-switching thing sometime this year.
4) I resolve not to make ANY lists in 2011!
...
.....
Dang. -
Happy New Year Everyone!
I'd give you all a New Year's kiss but... well... I don't know where you've been. -
Sorry, but when it comes to movie soundtracks and dance mixes nothing beats the Mortal Kombat sound track.
Flawless Victory -
Quote:Hmmmm...Originally Posted by TonyV
Am I the only one here who read the word "Annoying" as a verb and was disappointed that this wasn't a how-to guide?
::jots down that idea for a later thread concept:: -
Him:"You don't have any IO sets on you?"
Steelclaw: 1) "Well, I have recipes and I have salvage... if you have an hour or so I can hook myself up."
Steelclaw: 2) "Input/Output sets? Umm... please tell me that isn't a computer nerd euphanism for dirty rp..."
Steelclaw: 3) "Enhancements are for wimps who don't know what REAL heroing is..."
Him:"Are you sure that you want to do this TF then? It's gonna be really hard and you're gonna get owned alot."
Steelclaw: 1) "Get owned? Are you SURE IO set isn't a euphanism?"
Steelclaw: 2) "Owned? Allow me to provide you with your own copy of the Emancipation Proclomation."
Steelclaw: 3) "S'okay... I'm working on my debt badge anyway."
Steelclaw: 4) "Wait... Owned? Nah... I'm just planning on hanging out by the mission door anyway..."
Him:"Hmm okay, I'll let you join us, but please make sure that you don't slow us down."
Steelclaw: 1) "You have a Granite Tank in the group and you're worried about ME slowing us down?"
Steelclaw: 2) "Oh sure, sure... no problem... ummm... The ITF is that one Positron gives out right? Should I meet you in Steel Canyon?"
Steelclaw: 3) "Oh thank goodness! The last team that let me join forced me to have dirty rp with the guy holding the star. It wouldn't have been so bad if they hadn't kept passing the darned thing around."
Granite: SB Plz (team chat)
Leader: Please don't forget to SB him!
Steelclaw: 1) "If he doesn't stop complaining SB gonna stand for Smacka B**ch..."
Steelclaw: 2) "Don't look at me... YOU hired him."
Steelclaw: 3) "I'm sorry... you see... I don't have IO's slotted... so my SB recharge takes foreeeeeeeeeeever."
Leader: But you didn't have him. A good kin is always aware when SB is fading
Steelclaw: 1) "When exactly did I say I was a good kin?"
Steelclaw: 2) "Excuse me, but I'm an ILLUSION/Kin... any goodness on my part is a figment of your imagination."
Steelclaw: 3) "Oh come on... you can't tell me that you don't find it funny as heck when he runs in place and only inches forward like that..."
Steelclaw: 4) "And ruin my entertainment?! Heck no! Beg for my SB... BEG FOR IT!! Who's your daddy... who's your daaaaaaddy?!"
Leader: What are you doing!? Why'd you summon them? Now she's gonna heal off of them
Steelclaw: 1) "I didn't summon them! Okay... who the heck summoned the store manequins?! Come on... own up!"
Steelclaw: 2) "Yes, but since they're illusory the damage she heals won't be real... it's genius!"
Steelclaw: 3) "Huh? Oh PA stands for Phantom Army... sorry, I thought it stood for Public Announcement... I was going to inform everyone not to summon pets since she'd just heal off of them."
Leader: You're phantom army!
Steelclaw: 1) "Wait... you can SEE them? The guy who sold me this power said they were PHANTOMS... what a rip off!"
Steelclaw: 2) "Wow... I bet Masterminds must really love you..."
Steelclaw: 3) "Hey... you're one of those time-travelling team leaders aren't you? You know... the one who travel backwards in time so they think the proper way to manage a team is to warn people what not to do AFTER they've already done it."
Leader: Yes she can, I've seen it before!
Steelclaw: 1) "And I've seen intelligent and effective leadership before... doesn't mean it's ALWAYS true."
Steelclaw: 2) "Really? Then do you see the gremlins too? Please tell me you do... they've been stealing my left socks."
Steelclaw: 3) "Well huh... I have an idea... why don't we just sit here and watch her and see if she is able to heal off them? We can even make a wager about it... just to warn you though... if I win my winnings are going to involve your mouth and some duct tape."
Leader: Yes really, now please unsummon them.
Steelclaw: 1) "I can't unsummon a summoned pet without the Kick option... pass me star so I can get rid of that troublesome team member for us..."
Steelclaw: 2) "You know... you really put the Task in Task Force... and I don't say that about just anyone."
Steelclaw: 3) "Sorry... I can't just this moment... I have to SB the tank." -
To: Developers of City of Heroes/Villains; Going Rogue
From: Santa Claus
Re: The Naughty/Nice List
I write this in the hopes that your Holiday Season thus far has been a jolly one. I say "thus far" because it is my clear intention to give each of you a fat lump of coal in your stockings upon my visit later tonight.
Please rest assured that I have not arrived at this course of action lightly.
I am sure that when you introduced Going Rogue and the concept of "side-switching" you were excited at the prospect of giving your players a more exciting and fulfilling way to play their characters. My elves have done research to conclude that, in this facet, you were very successful. However, you have made my life a logistical nightmare and, dare I say, a living hell.
Before you began fiddling with the natural order of things I had it easy. Heroes went on the nice list and Villains were stuck on the naughty. Things have changed, thanks to you. Where exactly am I supposed to put Rogues and Vigilantes? There is no "Sorta Nice" list nor is there a "Used to be Naughty but is 50% towards Rogue which would mean he's actually 25% of the way to Nice" list!!
And if that's not bad enough, you've made the process for changing which side you're on so fast that someone can be on the Nice list today and Naughty within a WEEK! The song doesn't even work anymore! "He's making a list... and checking it sixty-five times! The meter's all wrong and it no longer rhymes!'
Oh wait... maybe it does...
But I digress...
To compound the problems you've caused; you've began allowing alternate reality heroes and villains into my territory! Now, I'm all for sharing... it's one of the tenets of my credo. But come ON! First there's the logistical issues of trying to get Naughty/Nice information from an off-world source in the first place. Sure, I can see you when you're sleeping and no when you're awake here on Earth Prime... but do you know the expense of setting up a surveillance network from scratch on a whole different planet?!
Okay fine, so I flush my profit margin down the toilet for a few seasons, I can recover, but then I got a good look at this Praetorian world. Not a single... NOT ONE... black or white issue in the WHOLE FREAKING WORLD! EVERYTHING is a shade of gray!! Good grief it's a politician's wet dream! Every person coming to my territory from Praetoria is so firmly entrenched directly between Naughty and Nice that I've had to enact a policy stating they get NO presents at all until they've spent at least six months in Earth Prime so I can get a read on them.
So, enjoy your coal. Maybe you can burn it for a little heat this winter or just chuck it at that Baby New Year thing for a laugh. You can also expect a bill for my therapy costs sometime in early February.
Ho-Ho-Freakin'-Ho,
Santa
P.S. Expect a letter from Frosty's attorney sometime in the near future as well regarding his Defamation of Character suit. -
Dear Santa,
Next year please have the dev team come out with a Holiday Booster Pack with Christmas/Winter themed costume items, emotes and perhaps powers. Have half the proceeds go to Toys for Tots or some other national charity that provides toys for underpriveleged children.
We here at City of Heroes have what I consider the best on line community of any MMORPG out there. Our players have more heart. Our development team listens and responds. The general public should know about this.
This is a game of Heroes. Maybe it's time WE emulate the characters we play on line.
Sincerely,
Steelclaw -
Yes, I've been back in the recording studio much to the chagrin of the poor slobs who wear the headphones. This time my parodies are all Holiday tunes.
Once again, keep in mind that I am recording these songs with a pair of cheap headphones/mic combination and only able to select the songs offered for Free on the karaoke web site I use.
Also, we here at Steelclaw Studios are not responsible for hearing loss, sanity loss or any night terrors caused by listening to this album.
Track One: I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (Blue Side Version)
This is the heroic version of the song. Er... perhaps "heroic" should be in quotes... yeah... definitely in quotes.
http://www.singsnap.com/snap/r/b99b463ae
Track Two: I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (Red Version)
Due to his popularity on the first album we have brought back Grandville's own Westin Phipps to sing this old Holiday classic! You have been warned.
http://www.singsnap.com/snap/r/b9a2fface
Track Three: Jingle Bells
I personally liked this one, especially the writing of it. This one actually had me upset there weren't more choruses since I had WAY more material to fill it up for at least another six stanzas or so.
http://www.singsnap.com/snap/r/b3b5392be
Track Four: Frosty the Snowman
Oh come on, with killer snowmen jumping out of randomly dropped gift boxes everywhere how could I possibly NOT make this song?
http://www.singsnap.com/snap/r/b493d857e
Track Five: The First Noel
I was nervous about actually posting this one as I have no desire to offend any of our forumites who are deeply religious about Christmas. If you suspect this concern applies to you, you should likely skip ahead to the next track.
http://www.singsnap.com/snap/r/af7d0d49e
Track Six: Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas
I have taken the liberty of speaking for all the forumites with this song. It is intended to be playful but still very serious. It is my hope that at least one or two of the Devs listen to it since it was written for them. I hope all my fellow forumites believe it sums up our feelings for our beloved game's development team.
Considering my utter lack of anything resembling singing ability, if anyone who CAN sing would like to re-record this song and post it in the thread... please do.
http://www.singsnap.com/snap/r/b6b65e33e
Thank you all for listening. Thank you for all the laughs. I sincerely wish all the Forumites and Developers a very happy holidays and a fantastic new year.
~Steelclaw -
The people who leave behind spawned presents don't really bother me...
The "helpful" person who was spamming Speed Boost on everything that moved whether they requested it or not at the start line of the chute run bothered me...
... but not as much as the twit who was camping the finish line with all his Robot minions trying to tackle people just before they finished.