Mirror_Man

I guess I'll throw one of my creations in for consideration as "Best Custom Group"

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Custom Group Name: GP - Division 0

Found in:
Arc: The Galactic Protectorate -01
ID#: 47143

*****

Here are some screenshots of a few of the enemies found within this group:


Mind Medic


Agony Agent


Equator Engineer


Terrestrial Technician


Hydro Healer


Shadow Sniper


Energy Dancer


Comet Commander


Star Slinger


Storm Rider

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I could go into great detail about the enemy group, give descriptions of the characters, etc.; but I don't want to make this post any longer than it has to be

If I had to choose two keywords for this particular group, they would probably be: Challenging and Themed

I look forward to when voting begins

Hi PoliceWoman, I wanted to wait until I finished my latest arc before requesting a review in this thread, and now that I have...

I'd like to request reviews of my "Galactic Protectorate" Arcs

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Arc Name: The Galactic Protectorate - 01

Arc ID: 47143

Number of Missions: 3

Level Range: 40-54

*****

Arc Name: The Galactic Protectorate - 02

Arc ID: 11728

Number of Missions: 3

Level Range: 40-54

*****

Arc Name: The Galactic Protectorate - 03

Arc ID: 174352

Number of Missions: 3

Level Range: 40-54

*****

Arc Name: The Galactic Protectorate - 04

Arc ID: 269714

Number of Missions: 3

Level Range: 40-54

*****

Arc Name: The Galactic Protectoratae -05

Arc ID: 304290

Number of Missions: 3

Level Range: 40-54

*****

Arc Name: The Galactic Protectorate - 06

Arc ID: 355068

Number of Missions: 3

Level Range: 40-54

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Because the "Galactic Protectorate" follows a linear storyline, if you decide to review my arcs I'd suggest playing them in numerical order, otherwise you might get confused. I'd also suggest not trying to play them all at once; in fact, based on the previous feedback I've gotten it's probably best to play only one arc a day, and possibly playing some other arcs in between each of mine so as to "space" the story out and give you a "breather". Of course, it's up to you how you decide to play my arcs (if you decide to at all), so feel free to take or leave my suggestions

I'm not sure if this thread is still QPQ, but since you have six arcs listed in your signature as I'm typing this, I'd be glad to play though all of yours and give you some feedback before you review mine. In fact, I might do that anyway, considering how much everyone seems to enjoy your arcs

(Blows dust off thread)

Finally... after 4 months, more in-game hours than I care to count, and having to start the entire arc from scratch TWICE...

"The Galactic Protectorate -06" is now live

I NEVER would have imagined that this "chapter" of my ongoing story would take so long to publish, and in the end, I just BARELY managed to get the entire arc to fit into the file limiations for the AE System.

To be honest, the arc isn't COMPLETELY finished yet; everything story-wise is done, but the arc is missing one glaring detail: A Souvenir. As full as it is, I couldn't fit the souvenir into the arc, but no matter how much I tried, I couldn't figure out what to take away from the arc to make more room. Since I didn't want to start from scratch AGAIN, I decided to publish the arc without a souvenir, and hopefully the feedback I get will help me decide which areas of the arc I can cut down on in order to fit the souvenir.

This is going to be my last arc of 2009, and I hope the few of you who have been waiting patiently for the next "chapter" of my story aren't disappointed by it. As always, any feedback I get is appreciated

Thank you for your reviews of all of my arcs, Coulomb2! I'm glad you seemd to enjoy them, for the most part

It's always interesting to see how each reviewer reacts to and interprets the storyline of my arcs, but this was the first time someone did so in-character, so I enjoyed seeing how both you and Pro Payne experienced my arc.

I'm actually almost finished with the next "chapter" of the Galactic Protectorate storyline (this latest arc has been somewhat of a nightmare, mostly because I ran out of file space the first time I tried to design it and then had to basically start from scratch), and you're correct in thinking that it will be quite different from the previous installments. I'm always looking for feedback for my arcs, so I'll probably request another review from you once it's published

In any case, thanks again for reviewing all the arcs I've published thusfar in my "Galactic Protectorate" series; I greatly appreciate the feedback

Thank you for the detailed review of my first arc, Coulomb2!

To be honest, I know my arcs are challenging enough without having to further handicap yourself by using a "No-Powers" concept build, so it's good to know you used your "Super Build" for my arcs. In fact, you could even justify it in-character wise, with something along the lines of:

"Because the heroes are bringing Pro Payne into their universe through the MA System, a few 'wires' get crossed in Pro Payne's molecular structure whenever he 'hops' dimensions, giving him 'real' superpowers when he's in the GP Universe, but not when he's in the CoH Universe."

Or something like that, it's up to you, of course

I'm looking forward to your reviews of the rest of my arcs!

So, now that we finally have our first offical Guest Author Story Arcs published live in the MA System, I figured it was appropriate to start a thread where those of us who have decided to play one or all of the Guest Author arcs can post their feedback here on the forums

For those who don't know, the four Guest Author Story Arcs now available in the MA are as follows:

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Arc Name: OMG, it's the LOLBAT!

Guest Author: Scott Kurtz

Arc ID#: 337435

Description (Taken from the official CoH Website): OMG! Your new contact on the street is none other than the internet meme-obsessed hero, the LOLBAT, and he brings grave if not confusing news. The Algonquin Hate Table, a rogues gallery of the LOLBAT's greatest foes, are looking to expand their heinous if not artfully influenced crime syndicate into Paragon City. If you know what's good for you and the citizens you protect, you won't let that happen. Luckily, the LOLBAT knows how these guys work and he's ready to help you defeat these pompous profligates.

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Arc Name: Mission: Awesome

Guest Author: Rooster Teeth

Arc ID#: 337438

Description (Taken from the official CoH Website): Help Captain Dynamic defeat the Great Face's evil plans...

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Arc Name: The Great Face-Off

Guest Author: Rooster Teeth

Arc ID#: 337436

Description (Taken from the official CoH Website): The Great Face is wanting to wreak havoc on Paragon City. He needs your help to free him from Paragon Prison and then carry out his master plan...

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Arc Name: Quest for Magic

Guest Author: Bill Willingham

Arc ID#: 337434

Description (Taken from the official CoH Website): Irena Faust is tired of being a civilian in a super world, so she's embarked upon a quest for super powers. She thinks magic is the way to go and she has an idea where to start. Can you help her?

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So, if you decide to play one or more of these story arcs, and want to leave some feedback in this thread, feel free to post your thoughts regarding these arcs here. Please keep all feedback constructive, and as always, respect the forum guidelines when submitting your post

Once you've reached Level 40, I'd like to request that you try my "Galactic Protectorate" story arcs (listed in my signature).

There are currently 5 (hopefully 6 by the end of this week) arcs, each 3 missions long, and all designed with the enemies set to Level 40-54. The arcs follow a linear storyline, so if you're interested in trying them all out, I'd suggest playing them in order to get the best "feel" of the overall story.

The enemies in the arcs are quite challenging, so you might want to lower your difficulty settings a bit before trying my arcs. I'd also suggest "spacing out" my arcs if you're going to play them all; maybe just one or two a day, so you don't get "burned out" trying to play them all at once. Though, that's just a suggestion

Another quick update:

So, things haven't exactly gone as planned this week. I was alot busier than I though I'd be, and wasn't able to log on to the game nearly as much as I wanted. Then, when I was finally able to work on "The Galactic Protectorate - 06", I ran out of file space by the middle of the 2nd mission

So, I'm going to re-work the arc over this upcoming week, and hopefully I'll have more free time than I had this week to work on it. Once again, I apologize to the few of you who were waiting for the next "chapter" to be finished this week.

On a side note, this is turning out to be (in my opinion) the most interesting "chapter" of the story since I first began "The Galactic Protectorate", so I'm really anxious to see the final result when I (hopefully) finish tweaking the story arc this week

Alright, another update:

Since the new Issue came out, all my free time has been spent updating my custom characters and published arcs, as well as changing some of the color FX on my own characters

If all goes as planned, I should have "The Galactic Protectorate - 06" published by this time next week, though I'll be sure to post here if anything comes up to push that back. Things have gotten alot busier lately IRL, but I'll try my best to get the next "chapter" of my story up on schedule for the few of you who enoy playing it

Just a quick update:

I know it's been awhile since I've posted, but I've been spreading out all my free time between working on "The Galactic Protectorate - 06" and playing the game, so I haven't had much time to check on the boards.

As it is, I really like the design for the custom group in this upcoming arc (though I'm probably biased in that regard), and I'm probably going to be using some mission architect mechanics I've never used before in "The Galactic Protectorate - 06", but right now I'm debating whether or not to wait until Issue 16 is released on the live servers before releasing the next arc. With "The Galactic Protectorate - 04", I waited until Issue 15 hit the servers before publishing it, and I personally think the arc turned out alot better because I waited, so I'm inclined to do the same for "The Galactic Protectorate - 06", but... eh. We'll see.

Anyway, just letting the few people who are interested in my arcs know that I'm still working on the next part, and I haven't abandoned "The Galactic Protectorate" storyline. I'll be sure to post in this thread again once I've completed the next part

Thanks for the review, airhead!

It's nice that you pointed out the "frivolous" nature of the 8th Division, since that was kind of what I was going for when I designed them

The reason why you're going after "just a concert" has to do with the (mandatory) clue in the 1st mission. General Sonica has been ordered to keep Mynx with her at all times, and since you know that the general's going to be at the concert, it stands to reason that Mynx will be there, too.

The reason that Mynx's captors mention that the concert is canceled is because General Sonica did, in fact, cancel the concert at the last minute (hence the apology in her opening dialog). I can see where the confusion came from, however, so I'll try and re-work the dialog in the arc to make that point clearer this week.

The optional clues in the final mission were actually set to "Middle", not "Back", though for some reason they still spawn in the back... I think it's a bug in the AE system Regardless, I've moved the three optional clues in the last mission to the first one, so it's less likely that the player will miss them. Considering the second mission is a large outdoor map, I'd rather not have the player search for clues (optional or otherwise) in it.

The 8th Division, as a whole, is not a band, but it does contain a band ("The Sonica 5") within it. Most of the division is an (admittedly unorthodox) military group, with an emphasis on sonic-based powers. "The Sonica 5" themselves function much like a USO Show in the real world, except organized under the authority of the Galactic Protectorate rather than a seperate, private organization. I actually wanted to include the entire backstory of "The Sonica 5" in the arc itself, but I doubt I have the room to do so

The 8th Division was always based around sonic abilities, it's just that the previous general was more... authoritative in her command, and the division was far less laid back than it is now under General Sonica.

In any case, I'm probably going to take this upcoming week to work on improving some minor details in the arcs I already have published; I've come up with a few ideas I'd like to test out. In regards to "The Galactic Protectorate - 06", I've actually got some interesting new ideas that I'd like to see how the AE system interprets; if all goes well, the next "chapter" of my story should be VERY different the previous installments.

Anyway, thanks again for your review, airhead!

Well, after an additional week of experimenting and testing... I'm still not COMPLETELY satisfied with the final result, but I think I've reached the stage where outside input will help alot more than my personal tastes. So, I'm pleased to announce:

"The Galactic Protectorate - 05" is now published on the live servers

Arc ID# 304290

Any feedback I can get on my arcs is always appreciated

If you are still accepting new submissions, you might be interested in my "Galactic Protectorate" Arcs (the ID#'s are in my signature).

While it's still an ongoing (multi-arc) story, each "chapter" is filled with custom enemies which I spent alot of time and effort creating, with a unique storyline not related to canon (the entire story takes place in an alternate universe).

Almost all the people who've played my arcs and provided me feedback have enjoyed my custom enemy groups (even if they didn't enjoy the rest of the arc), so you and your friends might like my arcs, as well

Alright, so today's the day that I thought the next chapter in my "Galactic Protectorate" storyline would be finished, but unfortunately... I'm going to have to push the release back a week

To those of you who were expecting it today, I sincerely apologize. I can't tell you how many times I went over and tested the arc today, and I'm just not happy with it in it's current state. I like the way the new custom group turned out this time, but as for the current flow and pacing of the arc itself, I still personally feel it needs more work. The good news is, I have a few ideas that I'm going to try over this next week, and I'm confident that I can have it ready by August 15th (and I mean it this time). But right now, I'd rather wait and publish (what I feel) will be a good arc next week than publish a lackluster arc just to meet the deadline I set up. I will try my best over this next week to work out everything so it's ready by the 15th.

Again, I apologize for not having the arc ready by the date I indicated earlier, but I want this arc to be as well-written as I can make it before I publish it for your feedback.

Yeah, I'm surprised too. I thought Freedom and Virtue were going to be full by this evening, but last I checked they were both still up.

Crowded, but up

So, with the release of the new boards, I'd like to re-re-open my Review Thread for anyone who wants their Story Arc reviewed!

As a reminder, here's how this thread works: If you would like to request a review, post your AE Story Arc in this thread. Then, play one of the arcs in my Galactic Protectorate storyline (Arc ID#'s located in my signature; I would suggest starting with the "The Galactic Protectorate - 01", since my storyline is linear) and post a review in this thread. The review can be as long or short as you want, just as long as it's constructive. I don't hold it against you if you didn't like one of my arcs, nor do I provide favoritism in my review of your arc if you give my arc a good score. All I ask is that you clearly state WHY you did or didn't like my arc; try to be a little more constructive than just posting "Your arc was horrible" or "Your arc was awesome" and leaving it at that.

Once you've posted your review of my arc, I'll play through your requested arc and post my review in this thread. If you want to get a feel of my reviewing style, please feel free to read through the reviews I've already written in this thread.

Remember, this thread is for MY reviews of OTHER people's arcs; post your review of my arc(s) in the thread I've linked to above.

Alright, with all that said, this thread is now re-re-open!

I like the look of these new boards, though I need to re-learn how to use certain features, such as emotes

Alright, important update: I now have a schedule for the release of "The Galactic Protectorate - 05"! If all goes as planned, the next "chapter" should be up on the live servers on August 8th. If something comes up that will throw off this schedule, I'll be sure to post in this thread letting everyone know, but right now I feel pretty comfortable posting August 8th as the "release date".

Hope those following my story will like it, I put alot of work into it

( Hey, I figured out how emotes work! )

Alright, after a week off the boards to deal with RL and play the game casually, I'm back and working on the next part of my story, "The Galactic Protectorate - 05"

It's still in it's early stages of development, so I don't have a schedule for release yet; rest assured, I'll be posting in this thread when the next "chapter" of my story is ready to go live!

Alright, after a nice week off the boards, I'm back and ready to accept any review requests again!

ArrowRose, I'm not sure whether my feedback will still be useful to you (since the post I'm responding to is almost a week old), but as I said before in my re-review of your arc, I would suggest either better incorporating the whole "time travel" concept into your arc or get rid of it entirely. I was a bit surprised by the 7-year jump in the middle of your arc the first time I played through it, but looking back now, the 7-year time skip made alot more sense than the "time travel" sub-plot you have now. As I said before, I personally think time travel could work with this arc, but as you have it written right now, I felt it was awkward and out of place. A little touching up of the dialogue could fix that, though, so the choice is up to you.

Of course, since it's been awhile since I played your arc, you may have already changed the dialogue or removed the time travel component entirely, making my suggestions completely useless

Anyway, just letting everyone know that I'm still accepting review requests in exchange for playing one of my arcs; just remember to put your reviews of my arcs in this thread

Thanks for your review, Beach_Lifeguard, your feedback is appreciated as always

You're not the first person to dislike the first map in this arc, so I'll probably go back and change it to a smaller version soon. I would have also liked lower the amount of Web Grenades the custom group has, but Web Grenade seems to be a required power for Devices, and given the theme of the custom group, there's not much I can do about it

Anyway, I'll go over the 3rd Arc and see what I can improve today. Thanks again for the review!

Alright, now that my new arc is out, I can focus on reviews again (for the time being, at least ). Next up is a re-review of ArrowRose's arc

*****

Arc Name: In Pursuit of Liberty

Author: Gypsy Rose (ArrowRose)

Character Used: Level 50 DB/WP Scrapper

Score Last Review: 3 Stars

Notable Updates:

The biggest change to this arc (and the change I enjoyed the most) were the descriptions on the custom characters. Almost every member of the Anti-Liberty League was given a more detailed background, which was a really nice touch by the author. The enemy groups for each mission were nicely diversified, too, with a new group (well, more like a collection of the standard enemy groups), "The Dark Alliance", appearing in mission 4. Finally, there were many grammar corrections throughout the arc, and even though there were still a few errors in the dialog and clues (I'll list the ones I found at the end of this re-review, though I'm sure I missed a couple), it was a huge improvement over the first time I played this arc.

Overall Impression:

I had an enjoyable experience the last time I played this arc, so it was a nice surprise to have an even BETTER experience this time around. The corrections and fleshing out of the small details in this arc really helped improve the overall flow and feel the story; there really is a 5-star story at the heart of this arc.

There was just one glaring flaw I noticed throughout the arc: The entire "time travel" concept (which previously was only present in the 4th mission) both looked and felt tacked on, which I personally thought did more harm than good to the story. To be honest, it wasn't the fact that it was present that I felt was awkward (I actually think the "time travel" concept could work with this arc); it was the fact that the author would place the new "time travel" dialog in places where it seemed to contradict the rest of the story.

For example, in the first mission intro, Ms. Liberty tells you that Little Liberty is in danger, making it seem like an immediate threat. However, she then explains that she'll be sending you back in time 7 years to save Little Liberty, meaning that she's not actually in danger NOW, but rather WAS in danger 7 years ago. Now, it's possible that the author meant that the ALL sent the Family back in time to captured Little Liberty, thus altering her destiny, but if that's the case, it would be nice if the dialog was changed to make that point clearer.

The second mission intro dialog is even more awkward, with Ms. Liberty telling you that Little Liberty has gone out searching for treasure, but then reveals that, once again, this is the Little Liberty from 7 years ago, meaning she went out looking for treasure 7 years ago, and... yeah, it's a little confusing.

This may or may not be helpful to the author, but I noticed that the Liberty League descriptions (as well as the Fern Fatale description) seemed to be limited to the 300 character limit the mission editor restricts you to when writing a description for a named enemy/ally/hostage. If the author has a longer description written in for the Liberty League and/or Fern Fatale that was written in the custom character description box, it's possible to get that description to show up if you leave the mission editor description box empty. I don't know if that will help the author, but just in case

Aside from that, however, the author did a great job improving both the arc and the custom enemy group, and with just a little more fleshing out of the small details, as well as making the "time travel" concept more streamlined so it fits in better with the dialog, this can definitely be a 5-star arc. Even without that, however, I would still recommend this arc for anyone looking for a nice, enjoyable story

Final Score: 4 Stars

Grammar Corrections:

Mission 1 Intro: Hello $name -> Hello, $name

Mission 1 Send-Off: please go find her -> please, go find her / hurry there isn't much time -> hurry, there isn't much time

Agent Liberty Dialog (after rescuing her in mission 1): OK we need to go get -> OK, we need to go get

Fearsome Follower Description: are have -> have

Note to Al: Don't ask why. Just trust me! -> Don't ask why, just trust me!

Thank You Note: Those my friend are -> Those, my friend, are

Mission 2 Send-Off: Hurry it will be dark soon! -> Hurry, it will be dark soon!

Feline Follower Description: becoming a Feline Followers -> becoming a Feline Follower

Treasure Chest Interaction: No sorry it is not -> No, sorry, it is not

Mission 2 Mission Complete Pop-Up: No you can't wear it -> No, you can't wear it

Mission 2 Outro: Wow you did it -> Wow, you did it / Thanks you have -> Thanks, you have

I'm sure I missed some, but this should help you a little bit, at least

*****

Alright, as always, any review requests will be accepted if you're willing to review one of my arcs, so feel free to post

Nice to see you back reviewing again, Beach_Lifeguard!

You've already played two of the arcs in my "Galactic Protectorate" storyline; I've come out with two more since then (the latest was just released yesterday), so if you'd like to continue your reviews of my arcs, your feedback is always appreciated

Thessalia and airhead, thank you both for your reviews. This is the quickest I've ever gotten feedback on any of my GP arcs, and I'm slightly embarassed by the number of typos I let slide this time. I'm grateful to both of you for pointing them out, it really means alot to me

I notice you both pointed out the rather frequent use of "Ahem" Ms. Liberty used throughout this arc; that was intentional, and no, she doesn't have throat cancer

When characterizing Ms. Liberty, I wanted her to be someone who cared very deeply for her friends, but did her best to hide it behind a "cool-headed" and "professional" image. As such, she often gets more emotional than she feels is appropriate for a hero, and thus the "Ahem" is her trying to calm herself down and regress into her "cool-headed" persona. Although, you both are probably right in that I overdid it; I'll try and see where in Ms. Liberty's dialog I can tone it down a bit.

I also agree with you, airhead, in that I need to change things up a bit, as the arcs are getting a bit repetitive. I did try to alter things a bit this time with the maps and the battle with the Circle of Thorns, but I'll try and come up with a more varied approach to the next arc. The problem is balancing that out with the overall story.... I'll see what I can do.

Thanks again, Thessalia and airhead!

Sorry it took so long to reply, ArrowRose, all of my free time has been spent putting the final touches on my latest arc, "The Galactic Protectorate - 04"

I'll try and run your arc tomorrow if I have time, if not I'll definitely run it on Monday