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Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
OCTOBER 12, 2005
*Ring*
Bo Bindel: 'Dis Bo Bindel.
Oglost: Hey, Bo. It Oglost.
Bo Bindel: Hey, Oglost.
Oglost: Me got info from cop on payroll. Got name of that license plate you looking for.
Bo Bindel: 'Dat big-time. What name?
Oglost: Looks like him name Paragon Carrento.
Bo Bindel: Okay. Okay. Me Telling Svrgyn. Hold on one sec.
(Muffled sounds of "Me no gonna ask 'im"...and..."Well, Svrgyn no gonna ask 'im"...and..."You gonna ask 'im...and "No, you gonna ask him.")
Bo Bindel: Uh, Oglost. You sure name not Paragon Car Rental?
Oglost: Whatever, you figure it out 'den!
*click* -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
OCTOBER 11, 2006
Dunnogard: So probably you going out with Indigo tonight?
Bo Bindel: No, we broken up again.
Dunnogard: Again...? Dat like 4 times in 5 days. What is it this time?
Bo Bindel: Me no know. (*sigh*) Bo Bindel just tell her she keep leaving socks over here probably her shoes are gonna' smell! -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
OCTOBER 10, 2006
Bo Bindel find him always get real contemplative this time of year. Probably 'cause it Christoper Columbus Day and Bo Bindel no know who that is! Any way, Bo Bindel write this poem for kape jerks:
Bo Bindel like the Fall
Watching the leaves turn from green to yellow to red
But what Bo Bindel really like...
Is watching kape jerks...
Turn from green...
To yellow...
To red
Raaawrrrr! -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
OCTOBER 7, 2005
"'Dat stupid big-time finance guy lie to us," say Bo Bindel. "'Dis truck was s'pose to be leaving company with big-time payday and there nothing in here but these small-time crappy pieces of paper with ink on 'em."
"Those checks," say Svrgyn. "Small-time people use 'dem for money."
"Man, 'dat is small-time," say Bo. "Now what we gonna do?"
"Well, it not a total loss," say Dunnovel.
"Why 'dat?" Ask Bo.
"We still got eighteen-wheeler," say Dunnovel.
"'Dat right!" Say Bo.
"What we gonna do with eighteen-wheeler though," ask Svrgyn.
(Later...at the Troll hideout.)
"Atta, please, please, please excuse interruption," say Oglost. "But Bo Bindel back with 40 ATM machines."
"I get the dynamite," say Atta. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
OCTOBER 6, 2005
Bo Bindel: Take a few practice swings, Junior. Stretch.... Work the kinks out.
Beovark: No way Junior gonna stop eighteen-wheeler with stickball bat.
Bo Bindel: Him gonna do it.
Beovark: Bet you Thomas Jefferson Troll.
Bo Bindel: Now you just making up Trolls.
Beovark: Him real Troll. Him worth half as much as Benjamin Franklin Troll.
Bo Bindel: 'Dat not bad. You on.
And the pitch...!
(*SMAAAAAAAAAASH!*)
Bo Bindel: Hah! Ha!
Beovark: Awwww vlard. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
OCTOBER 5, 2005
Beneath the rocky quagmire of the Hollows crack the brazen whips of the Troll slavemasters as they drive their wailing, broken and sweaty subjects to work in the total blackness.
And somewhere in its cavernouse center sits Atta contemplating his next move. Circling around him, a ring of dynamite, a ring of Troll bodyguards, a ring of dynamite, a ring of Troll bodyguards. In his hand, a detonator to send the whole complex crashing down on any Trolls who dare to challenge him...and of course, his last faithful companion...Boomer.
Atta: What you think Boomer? We gonna get another dog? Boomer want 'nother dog to play with?
(*whimpers*)
Atta: Ha. Ha. Boomer just like Atta! Boomer want to be the top dog. But what about other Trolls? We get another doggy for Boomer to take Superdyne with probably you gonna keep Atta twice as safe?
(*growls*)
Atta: Ha. Ha. What's a matter Boo....
Oglost: Excuse me your biggest-big time Troll Atta.
Atta: Raaaaaawr! What you want?
Oglost: Oglost sorry to bother Atta. But Bo Bindel got him ATM machine and not even Grundwar or Jaegur or me can open it.
Atta: It new alloy mined in Sharkhead.
Oglost: Titanium?
Atta: No.
Oglost: Adant-um?
Atta: Graaaaawr!!! No this something else!!!
Oglost: Sorry Atta. Bo Bindel wonder if maybe using dynamite we can blow it up?
Atta: There gonna be prolly $25,000 dollars in there! Amount of dynamite needed to blow up alloy gonna big-time destroy 99 percent of money! 'Dat not even worth it! You interrupt Boomer's daily affirmation hour for 'dat!? Apologize...!
Oglost: Sorry, Atta.
Atta: Raaawr! Not to Atta! To Boomer!
Oglost: Sorry, Boomer.
Atta: Dat better. Now, who's a good boy?
Oglost: Boomer.
Atta: And who's a really, really good boy?
Oglost: Boomer.
Atta: 'Dat right. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
OCTOBER 4, 2005
Dunnogard: 4LK 728!
Anonymous Lady: That's me!
Dunnogard: 'Dere ya' go. 343 WZK!
Anonymous Man: Right here!
Bo Bindel: Troll Twins, what you doing?
Dunnogard: We send Baby Clock to go grab license plate of guy who following us, but him come back with like 52 of 'em.
Dunnovel figure we hand back out license plates and whoever don't stick around to get theirs is the guy following us.
Bo Bindel: FN8 722!
Anonymous Man #2: Yo! -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
OCTOBER 3, 2005
Dunnogard: Bo, maybe Bo gonna let Dunnogard drive.
Bo Bindel: Bo told you. Bo feel like driving today. Beovark, what we doing today and where Svrgyn?
Beovark: No know. AND...! No know.
Bo Bindel: Look...! You gotta start writing this stuff down! Bo Bindel no have time to keep going over stuff over and over!
First, we meeting deadbeat got him big-time finance job, owes us for Superdyne. Second, we gotta pick up clam shells from Mr. Lee Mr. Shui....
Beovark: Clam shells?
Bo Bindel: Dat right clam shells! Why you gotta break Bo's flow?! Bah!! Me forget what else we suppose to do!
Dunnovel: Bo, we being followed.
Bo Bindel: How you know?
Dunnovel: 'Cause every time you smash into side of road this guy stop behind us.
Bo Bindel: Bo no smashing into side of road. Bo getting ATM machine. Grab it. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 29, 2005
HERE LIES
JULIUS EDWIN GAVIN
1979 - 2005
"Silence in the face of wrongdoing only frees the arrogance needed to perpetuate it."
-- Estelle Levy
So.... Hey, Julius the Troll.
This kind of awkward and everything but Bo thought... Bo thought it time to come see you.
Bo not no if you can hear me or even if you can if it gonna make a difference. Bo just wanted to come say...sorry.
Maybe that not good enough after what Bo did to you, but me, you, Svrgyn use to be friends. How you think it make me and Svrgyn feel all of a sudden you gonna hang out on bridge with kape jerks all day. Half of them beating the crap outta Svrgyn and me on regular basis.
We all use to be friends. What me and Svrgyn do to you that you no want to hang out any more? It like you to good for us something like that and....
Oh, what Bo Bindel saying. Probably you somewhere waaaaaaaay Grendeled off at Bo Bindel, and me giving you lecture 'bout kape jerks.
Any way, Julius. If you can hear me, Bo Bindel just want to say me sorry 'bout how things turned out. Bo hope you in a better place where maybe you just back to being Julius instead of Julius the Troll or whatever make you happy.
Bo hope you can find it in yourself to forgive Bo. It always seem like you maybe better at that kind of stuff then most Trolls. Me get so mad some times me just wanna...Raaaaawrrrrrr!
Okay. Okay. Bo shutting up now. Rest in peace, Julius. You earned it.
(*walks away*)
Oh, and Julius? Right now Freudal using your Ipod. Probably you want Bo to have that right?
Thanks, Julius! You the best! -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 28, 2006
Indigo: "So, sorry about the big break-up this morning, Bo. But it's a lot like that Zen Buddhist parable about the Monkey King."
So, probably you wondering how this happen. Momma Bindel gone and Bo here with Indigo. Bo Bindel tell you.
Indigo: "The Monkey King jumps into the hand of Buddha and says...."
Bo Bindel Crew in the mood for big-time celebration 'bout something so we start off the night with a private room at Super King China Buffet. We trying to eat $55,000 worth of food.
Indigo: "'Hey, Buddha! I am the Monkey King and I demand to be recognized for my greatness!'"
After restaurant, Troll Twins pull some strings and get us into VIP party at Paragon Dance Club.
Indigo: "The Monkey King says to Buddha, 'And for my greatness, I should be elevated to the status of a god!'"
So, we hanging out at dance club having good time and all of a sudden Beovark and Svrgyn come up to Bo Bindel all excited.
Indigo: "Buddha says to the Monkey King, 'Alright, Monkey King. If you can leave the comfort of this world. If you can jump from my hand and travel all the way to the mysterious West, I will accommodate your request.'"
Bo Bindel never seen Svrgyn and Beovark having so much fun together. It like they always best friends.
Indigo: "So the Monkey King jumps westward from Buddha's mighty hand."
They talking about how they big-time hitting it off with Fucia and Magenta, Indigo's sisters, but they want them help with Indigo so she not messing things up for four of them.
Indigo: "The Monkey King makes it all the way to the West, but then his jump was so mighty, he keeps going."
Bo Bindel tell them that not good idea and Bo Bindel don't even know what she talking about half the time.
Indigo: "Eventually, the Monkey King makes it all the way to the edge of the universe."
Then Bo Bindel start asking Junior for ride to see Mary Helen and Beovark and Svrgyn getting REALLY mad.
Indigo: "There the Monkey King finds 5 pillars. To prove his greatness and that he had made it all the way to the edge of the universe, the Monkey King pulls out a pen and writes his name on one of the pillars."
Them yelling at Bo Bindel why Bo no help out Svrgyn with girl. But what Beovark talking about? Him no care if Svrgyn score or not, but it lookin like it going to be package deal 'cause there three of them and three of us.
Indigo: "So proudly, the Monkey King jumps all the way back and lands again in Buddha's hand where he exclaims, 'See how great I am Buddha?! I not only made it to the West but I made it to the edge of the world! Now...! Make me a god!"
So Bo Bindel say okay. Bo Bindel gonna be wing-Troll but them really gonna owe me for this one.
Indigo: "But Buddha says, 'But Monkey King...? How did you make it to the end of the world when you never left my hand?' And the Monkey King looks at one of Buddha's fingers and sees his own signature...'The Monkey King"...on Buddha's mighty digit."
Plus, her got great legs. Heh Heh.
Indigo: "Bo...! Who are you talking to?! That's it! We're breaking up!!"
Bo Bindel: "Again?" -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 27, 2006
"We big-time gather to commemor-whatever, Spike," say big, biggest-time-Troll, laid-off-engineer, somewhat endomorph body type, thick black glasses with pen protector in pocket Troll Atta!
"And now, Atta gonna ask one of you to say few word," him say. "Beovark...."
Beovark say, "Huh?! Eh, meh mig-time sowwy. Meowark ea' him spishey habanero chiwwy peppeh fe' lunch. Me no can talk. Bo Bindel.... Him do it."
"Grr" Atta say. "Bo."
Oh, no! Bo Bindel whisper Svrgyn to help Bo.
"'Kay. Kay," Svrgyn whispering. "We now lay to rest."
"We now lay to rest," say Bo."
"Spike..." Him whispering.
"Spike," say Bo.
"Who was much like us in many ways," whisper Svrgyn.
"Who much like us in many ways," say Bo.
"Spike like to dig in the ground...." whisper Svrgyn.
"Spike like to dig in the ground," say Bo Bindel.
"Trolls like to dig in the ground...." whisper Svrgyn.
"Troll like to dig in the ground," say Bo.
"Spike like Superdyne," whisper Svrgyn.
"Spike like Superdyne," say Bo.
"Trolls like Superdyne," whisper Svrgyn.
"Troll like Superdyne," say Bo.
"And though Bo Bindel no son of a b-tch..." whisper Svrgyn.
"And though Bo Bindel no son of a b-tch," say Bo.
"Svrgyn...!" whisper Bo.
"Heh heh he," him say. "Sorry.
"Bo Bindel like to think we all Trolls in a way," whisper Svrgyn.
"Bo Bindel like to think we all Trolls in a way," say Bo.
"Troll is Troll is Troll," whisper Svrgyn.
"Troll is Troll is Troll," say Bo Bindel.
"And Spike....", whisper Svrgyn.
"And Spike," say Bo.
"Was a Troll," whisper Svrgyn.
"Was a Troll," say Bo.
"A good Troll," whisper Svrgyn.
"A good Troll," say Bo.
"Amen," whisper Svrgyn.
"Amen," say Bo.
"Amen," say all Trolls.
Beovark try to sprint away real fast but him no leaving graveyard alive. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 26, 2006
"Beovark, what you doing?" Ask Bo Bindel.
Beovark say, "Me beating crap outta this Mega Mart jerk."
"Well, get in Junior's car," say Bo Bindel. "One of Atta's dogs died and we going to funeral in Hollows."
"Atta's dogs!" Him cringing in fear.
"Yeah, Bo Bindel said the same thing but we gotta go," say Bo. "We stopping by Troll Twins to get you clothes. Between them being metrosexu-trolls and Orthodox J-w they gonna have plenty of black suits for us."
"Dis your lucky day, jerk," Beovark say to Mega Mart clerk as him getting into car.
"What clerk do anyway?" ask Svrgyn.
"Him sell me box of Cap'n Crunch with no crunch berries in it," say Beovark.
"Cap'n Crunch no have Crunch Berries," say Svrgyn. "Cap'n Crunch CRUNCH-BERRIES brand Cap'n Crunch got the big-time crunch berries."
"Eh," say Beovark. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 23, 2005
Probation Officer: Bo! What are you doing with your life?! Why can't you be more like Jimmy Foster!? He's got a good job and cleaned himself up. You're still running around with this same pack of trouble-makers. And I know this Oglost is up to his @$$ in Superdyne. If you keep going like this, Bo, where are you going to be? Bo...? Bo...!?
You haven't listened to a word I said have you?!
Bo Bindel: Huh? Yeah.
Probation Officer: What'd I say?
Bo Bindel: Umm. You talking about how deviled eggs gonna be good with paprika...without paprika...so what the difference?
Probation Officer: No, I wasn't.
Bo Bindel: ...were you thinking it 'dough?
Probation Officer: (*stares in disbelief*)
Bo Bindel: Be honest.
Probation Officer: (*stares in disbelief*) -
If there is any interest in a Vahzilok themed villain group let me know. My first villain was doing hero-hits for Dr. Vahz. Vahz noticed he was a little too good and thought he might make a good Eidolon. When my bad-guy got wind, he called a guarded meeting with Dr. Vahz...and showed up...with his face surgically removed.
The Dr. of course thought it was hilarious and let him stay on as an unzombified Vahzilok mercenary. Now, that's hardcore.
Gun, traps and presence. If anyone has Vahz baddies they want to team regularly or SG let me know. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
September 22, 2005
Svrgyn drop quick bead on Cap'n Comeuppance with Jager bottle. "Good job, Svrgyn," think Bo.
Beovark take a nasty one from Living Klaw just before back-flipping away from next one. Him smash two potato-vodka bottles to get nice long shards to counter with.
Troll Twins in corner with J'Nith'r'a'a'a'a." Them telling her she got prettty eyes some stuff, which pretty weird 'cause Bo always thought they breast-troll.
Next thing Bo know, Julius the Troll chasing Bo around bar. Sound of smashing glass all around. Bo snap out of it.
"What happened," say Bo.
"Kape jerks all passed-out drunk," say Dunnovel.
Them lying all around Steve's Bar like C.W. Fields after a pnk elephant stampede. Mary Helen and bluesman gone but look like Trolls win.
"Heh," say Bo Bindel. "Alcohol fumes must be too much for boy scouts."
"Kape jerks no can party," say Beovark.
"Nope," say Bo.
"Uh-uh," say Svrgyn. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
September 21, 2005
So...! Me picking up Mary Helen and taking her Steve's Bar. She yelling, screaming upset stuff like 'dat, but pretty soon she gonna hear that ol' bluesman play and everything gonna be alright.
"Bar stool gonna be first base, Bo say. "Juke box gonna be second. and Beovark him standing around like jerk no want to play so him third. Where Mary Helen standing with stickball bat...dat gonna be home stuff whatever."
Dat right! Junior teaching Trolls stickball. Got us 'dyne. And...! Steve no work on Thursdays.
"Junior...! You gonna teach Mary Helen to swing stick," say Bo. "And what you doing wind up for?! You got you Baby Clock on first. Him gonna try to steal for sure."
"Boooooooooo," say Mary Helen. "Please don't make me do this."
"What you waiting for, Junior!?" me say. "Why you no pitch the fifth to Mary Helan!?!"
"I don't know, Bo," say Junior. "She seems kinda...kinda scared."
"Dat just cuz she no smash fifth with stickball bat yet," say Bo. "It gonna be real funny cuz bottle gonna break.
"Bluesman...!" Say Bo Bindel, "Who say you gonna stop playing!?"
"I got the devil in me. It's the man that you see. I got the devil in me. It's the man that you see," him singing...real frantic.
*BOOOOOOOOM!*
"You stop right there, Bo Bindel!" Say Dr. Neuro-whatever, "Cap'n Comeuppance....! Let them have it, by Job!"
"You're going to get your comeuppance, Bo Bindel Crew," say Cap'n Comeuppance. "Oh, yes. Yes indeed. You will have your....."
"Awwwwww crap," say Bo. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
September 20, 2005
Dis month question come from small-time Trollkin, Attavlard. You gonna make it quick Trollkin.
Question: Bo, outside a' Grendel, who in you opinion top three all-time, biggest time Troll?
Answer: Bo Bindel gotta go with:
1) Atta
2) Benjamin Franklin
3) George Washington
Why Bo Bindel pick Benjamin Franklin over George Washington? Bo Bindel tell you.
When Bo go to buy something with Benjamin Franklin Troll, Bo Bindel usually get back a whole buncha George Washington Troll. But when Bo Bindel go to buy something with George Washington Troll, Bo just get back a whole buncha crappy coins with ol' ladies on 'em.
Bo no like small-time crappy coins! Bo smash Attavlard!! -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 19, 2005
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Make-Up Quiz
So, Svrgyn on first question WAS gonna put "C. Follow kape jerk to elevator" but 'dat was trick question. Answer was gonna be "D. All of the above."
Kape jerk run to elevator what you gonna do? You gonna beat chest AND throw rock AND chase kape to elevator.
Beovark WAS either gonna answer E to everything if him feel like jerk or D if him just play it safe. Scratch that. Beovark WAS just gonna answer E to everything.
Bo Bindel say WAS because everybody pass. Even Baby Clock gotta 70 percent. (Bo Bindel give him partial credit for "Hunt Clock" answer.)
Bo Bindel figure out everyone pass because Dunnovel give you all answers to test beforehand so him no have to teach class on Mondays. So, in the space below draw picture of Bo Bindel kicking Dunnovel in the %#@.
Be sure to get him long greasy pony tail right, and Bo Bindel want to see a lot of stink lines. Whoever draw best picture get Mercedes Benz 'dat Junior just steal for Dunnovel. Of course it no gonna do you any good 'cause you no even know how to ride elevator. Dummies! -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 18, 2005
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Pop Quiz
1. You beating up kape jerk. Kape jerk run to elevator. What you gonna do?
A. Beat chest.
B. Throw rock.
C. Follow kape jerk to elevator.
D. All of the above.
E. What was question again?
2. Little light above elevator kape jerk just get on pointing down. You gonna:
A. Press the button pointing down.
B. Press the button pointing up.
C. Forget what you doing and walk away.
D. All of the above.
E. What was question again?
3. You in the elevator now. What you gonna do?
A. Hunt Clock.
B. Troll no like elevator. Troll smash!
C. Press the button for the floor above/below depending on which way kape jerk go.
D. All of the above.
E. What was question again? -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 15, 2005
We walking near that gazeebo type park place in Brickstown. Svrgyn point to Swan and him say....
"Wow, that the prettiest girl Svrgyn's ever seen."
Beovark look to Svrgyn, and him say....
"Yeah, and that the nakedest girl Svrgyn's ever seen."
Heh. Heh. Heh. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 14, 2005
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Interoffice Memorandum
TO: Bo Bindel Crew
cc: Dunnovel
FROM: Bo Bindel
RE: Pop Quiz on how to use the elevator
DATE: September 14, 2005
As you know, Dunnovel big-time good at mechanical stuff like 'dat. Tomorrow at noon we having pop quiz on how to use elevator. Anyone who fail the test gonna have to attend Monday class with Dunnovel on how to use elevator.
And Bo Bindel no want to hear any complaining about having to be somewhere at Noon. If Bo Bindel can get up, you gonna get up. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 13, 2005
Bo Bindel: So you saying in some countries they eat the Tuatha @#%&*?
Svrgyn: 'Dat right. In some countries, they eat the Tuatha @#%&*.
Bo Bindel: But why they eat the Tuatha @#%&*?
Svrgyn: Because in some countries, the Tuatha @#%&* is a delicacy.
Bo Bindel: How much Tuatha @#%&* they gonna eat 'dough?
Svrgyn: Well, let's say on a given day in India, every man, woman and child eat just one Tuatha @#%&*, that gonna be at least one billion seven hundred million Tuatha @#%&*.
Bo Bindel: Holy crap! That's a lot of @#%&*!
Svrgyn: Uh huh.
Bo Bindel: Svrgyn, why you think they eat so much of the Tuatha @#%&*?
Svrgyn: Because, Bo, some believe the Tuatha's @#%&* has magical properties.
Bo Bindel: Really?! Bo Bindel didn't know that about Tuatha @#%&* .
Svrgyn: Uh huh. Svrgyn guess that magic-based level 50 kape jerk gotta eat between 48 to 65 Tuatha @#%&* every day.
Bo Bindel: Woah! Magic-based kape jerk really like the Tuatha @#%&*!
Svrgyn: No, Bo. Magic-based kape jerk LOVE the Tuatha @#%&*. Magic-based kape jerk can't get ENOUGH Tuatha @#%&*.
Bo Bindel:
Svrgyn:
Bo Bindel: Tuatha @#%&*.
Bo Bindel and Svrgyn: Heh heh heh. Heh heh heh heh heh. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 12, 2005
So, Bo Bindel crew in Boomtown having knife fights. You know. Fun!
Group of kape jerks come up to us. Bo Bindel laughing to self. Who gonna start fight with Trolls with knives in 'deir hands?
Hahahahahah! Heh heh heh heh hehe! Woo hooo hooo hooo hoo! Oh, maaan.
Turn out it not so funny. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 9, 2005
Bo Bindel: You gonna take you 550 Benjamin Franklin Trolls from Elvis contest and buy Mr. Shui him partnership back into restaurant to keep him outta Momma Bindel's.
Beovark: 'Dat total @#$@#$, Bo! Screw Mr. Lee, Mr. Shui. We Troll! They small-time!
We tell them we taking money and kicking out Mr. Shui! 'Dat what Trolls do, Bo! Beovark gotta good mind to give those two jerks to Atta and put them to work in Hollows caves!
Svrgyn: 'Dat what Svrgyn do with leftover Elviseses. Chasing my Clock around. *grumble* *grumble*
Bo Bindel: Svrgyn...!
Look, 'dat how Freudel do business and look how many connections he got left. Look at Oglost. Him do business with The Family, Skulls, all 'dat. Oglost crazy but him no burn bridges 'til all possibilities exhausta-whatever.
Beovark: Everything gotta be so complicated!
Bo Bindel: Yeah, dypsomniacs-security-company was complicated, but you do what Bo ask you to do and you make ton of money. Night of Elvises complicated and you NO do what Bo Bindel ask you to do, now you NO gonna make money. 'Dat pretty simple.
Beovark: Grrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!
(Bo Bindel and Beovark start beating crap outta each other. Svrgyn join in 'cause he mad about something else that Bo can't even remember what. Baby Clock gonna shock us every time we hit Svrgyn back. *Grumble* *Grumble*
Two Troll-bloody/Troll-sweaty hours later....)
Bo Bindel:There is one ray of light in all this though.
Beovark and Svrgyn: What that?
Bo Bindel: Bo Bindel think deviled eggs coming to an all-you-can-eat China Buffet near you real soon.
Beovark: Well, at $55,000, they better be good.
Bo Bindel: Yeah. Bo can't wait. -
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
SEPTEMBER 8, 2005
So...! Beovark win stupid Night of Elvises contest! Bo Bindel waaaaaaaaaaaaay Grendeled off!
Beovark: What you want Beovark to do, Bo!? Got him Backstreet Brawler outside door! Beovark no afraid of nothing. But come on...! We talking Backstreet Brawler here!
Bo Bindel: How you gonna win the @#$@# contest, though!? How hard is it for Troll to suck at Elvis impersonation!?
Beovark: Something happened! I don't know! I put on that big black pompadour wig! Slipped into rhinestone-studded bell bottoms and sunglasses and it like....! It like I became Elvis!!
Bo Bindel: What you talking about, Beovark!? You didn't even know difference between Elvis Presley and Billy Idol two weeks ago!
Svrgyn: Some things just can't be explained.
Bo Bindel: Awwwww shut up, Svrgyn.