During one day at the height of summer, six glittering starships appeared out of nowhere. Suddenly everything went dark. It was the curse of the evil monkey that eats cotton candy!
The people all fled in terror at the sight of the sticky-fingered monkey. It hurled large chunks of cotton candy at the innocent Omegatron Zeta Warbot, "Koo Koo Katchoo", who, caught unprepared, pulled up his iron underpants, and ran screaming into a brick wall.
Then the monkey laughed and said, "where's my punchline?" A man named Alfredo von Wigglestein appeared and said, "I think, therefore... I don't care. Now, you need to go to talk to the guy about registering for the special buns and thigh class. After all penguins have anurisms and I wear polyester thongs to school. Where was my jar of Honey Bees? Who will not drag my fat butt? Now what was the price of eggplants and bees again? I forget things quite quickly since I'm old. Although old is relative."
So then my sister Bruce bought a banana from a passing street vendor. He grabbed a dictionary and started to read aloud the definition for monkey curses. He then looked at the crumpled warbot, pointed and said, "Beware! Chaos is brewing beer!"
Then the warbot stood and drank beer.
Then my sister stripped naked and started to dance a sexy dance.
But the police helped her undress. Afterwards they ran in circles chasing Folonius while yelling the words to that pop hit polka song by the Andrews Sisters. That made Folonius roll out barrels of Rikti Monkeys. This proved problematic for the newly created government of the Rikti, for it had finally caged all of the barrel monkeys.
Lady Grey said, "I like to do weird stuff in the nude with the Rikti." So I took out my camera and filmed her from within her secret monitoring station. "I will never spy on her," said blpup pervertly as he passed out from poison. But just as he died, a passing noob stole his influence. Then burnt his body.
Soon the monkey scattered the ashes and ran home crying to mommy he'd been Riktirolled. The momma monkey ate Chaos Creator's little can of sausage to get even. Suddenly, the sausage regurgitated itself out of the monkey and said this, "Let my people go you jerk!" But then the Freedom Phalanx came and revealed that Chaos was happy. This surpised noone.
Then Chaos died a little inside. Later, he got on the interwebs,but got lag when he tried to look up sheep tied onto a kite. This saddened the chickens who wanted to eat sheep.
Suddenly a man wearing a big target on his jockstrap with three arrows on it, all pointing to his third nipple, busted into song:
"I can't get any more funny during this chaotic event, please help!"
Suddenly, Statesman said, "He who laughs first loses their chance to punch Defender in the genitalia! Don't laugh!"
Not laughing, Manticore took off his ill-conceived costume and started to dance like a meandering lama in split pea soup. Swan giggled and got naked before Popeye the Sailorman had a chance to eat spinich. This left him an opening to get Olive Oyl in the mix. Bluto was furious. Wimpy ate burgers.
Meanwhile, back at the hall of justice, Betty Boop was preparing to bath her puppy in a vat of boiling oil. She was killed by a man wearing a yellow sweater with matching socks. He also rode a Harley that did not stop eating Statesman. "Lego my Statesman!", he said. Shortly, a big red ball appeared and killed him too. The ball muttered its disappointment with a spatula.
Ghost Falcon appeared and began to remove his clothes so he could show off his new shiny and improved
No, I like sniping.
